The Great Scottland

NXT angle is now DOA + "Hey Yo" I've been canned

2010-06-15T15:42:00.000-07:00

Well that lasted long. Last week WWE had one of themost talked about angles when the NXT rookies jumped John Cena, CM Punk, the announcers, the ringside crew and destroyed the ring. It was great because no one knew it was coming and you had a bunch of rookies laying waster to a current and former World Champ. Then cam the news that Daniel Bryan, Bryan Danielson, was fired for choking announcer Justin Roberts with his own tie and then spitting on Cena. The complaint was reported to have come from outside the company and Bryan was being let go unfairly.
Now debating the hypocrisy of one getting fired over a tie choking and others suffering no repercussion when they handcuff and beat someone or a myriad of other offenses, just does not matter. Of course any wrestling fan will tell you that logic has gone the way of kayfabe these days.So on this weeks show everyone was curious to see how the angle would continue especially since it's best worker has supposedly fired. You see the day before Cena put out a Tweet that made this all seem like an elaborate angle. The show opens with Wade Barret, season 1 winner, and the other NXT guys in the ring. The would not apolgize for what they did the were just made at WWE management and wanted ti ake a point. Cue GM Bret Hart's music and he basically tells the guys they are fired. The all shuffle off and we are done. Except that half way throught he show John Cena gives a speech about how the NXT desicrated the sanctuty if the ring, I thought the Great Khali has done worse things in there, and even though they left he hopes they comeback. Naturally they do and right before the jump him, 75 year-old Jerry Lawler, Santino Marella, Steven Regal and other 2nd tier guys come out and give Cena aid. This is where the angle really dies by putting an old announcer and several joke wrestlers on the same level as teh NXT guys it killed their legitimacy. The locker room emptied as all the big names came out and hut their moves on the rookies sending them scurrying away as Santino and Mark Henry chased them away.
It was all high fives as they sold the fact that everyone came together to repel a common foe, something WCW never realized during the NWO run. During the final match the lights go out and we see the NXT guys destroying catering, oh no, and making a mess. They are carrying a beaten Bret Hart and throw him in the back of a limo. The limo then proceeds to run into several cars om purpose. Why this is supposed to be harmful when we ll know that cars have seat belts plus limo's are kind of big so it could not be that big of a deal since the driver seems fine.
The way it kills the angle is that we are now seeing that someone else is helping them, most likely Vince McMahon. He forewarned Bret a couple of weeks ago so it makes sense. What it does though is push the NXT guys in the background so a 65 year-old juiced up CEO can show everyone how tough he is.

On the other side TNA decided to shit can Scott Hall after he no-showed his court date fro public intoxication. No one in that company should be surprised at all. He has a HUGE problem with substance abuse and even burned teh company twice before.However, Hogan and Bischoff thought that since Hot Tub Time Machine was a big hit so would their retro approach to TNA.
Oops.

TNA debuts the new monster Knockout. EPIC FAIL!!

2010-06-04T07:18:00.000-07:00

The death of the KO division got a little bit closer with the debut of Rosie Lottalove. When she was signed she was supposed to take the place of Awesome Kong as the monster of the division. When we all saw her debut on Impact I think we can safely say that there is no chance in Hell of that happening. So the geniuses decided to make her into a 21st Century version of Bertha Faye. The gimmick is of a large woman who thinks she is sexy.
Get it, she's fat but she dresses skimpy so it's funny. Right?
Not really since I like big girls so I did dig her but the gimmick automatically makes her a joke character.
The great thing they did with Kong is that they never made light of Kong's size knowing that it would undermine her credibility. Seemingly with the departure of Dutch Mantell logic in the KO division is gone.
In the long line of recycling WWE storylines and talent, we will now have TNA doing the Piggy James storyline that was just done 3 months ago.
At least she did not layout the current champ in her debut even though the champ has a title match against someone else. OOPS.
Oh, I almost forgot the "best" thing, they decided to model her after Rosie O'Donnell. You know the same actress/comedian that isn't on TV and when she was most of the country hated her?
That same one because when you keep signing WWE/WWF/WCW personalities that are over 50 that seems like a current idea.
Fucking morons.

Sade-Soldier of Love CD Review

2010-03-11T21:11:00.000-08:00

The Caribbean songstress Sade has returned with another disc of songs to do the nasty to. She may as well have called this release Panty Dropper because we all know what is about to happen once her music is playing. Maybe Sade is Jamaican for Spanish Fly

He voice and delivery is as smooth and sultry as ever, capably backed by her stellar band. It would be a huge oversight not to mention them as they allow the platform for which she is able to do what she does best.

The album kicks off, actually it is more turns off the lights, with “the Moon and the Sky”. Its’ lyrics are bout undying love as tired subject matter that is honestly what all her songs are about but she does such a great job on the lyrics and feeling that you just want to kiss someone. The title track is next and it may pause you at first upon hearing the near hip-hop beat. The threat of a rapping duet is unfounded and the beat along with the military drums underscores the subject matter.

While almost every song is love of some form, the feeling and sincerity about her performance is never questioned. You feel the emotion and honesty in every word and never doubt what she is saying. Someone needs to sit the guys from H.I.M. down and make them listen so their gothic love shtick isn’t so corny.

There are 11 tracks on Soldier of Love and while they are all not winners the album coalesces into one great candle lighting, wine drinking, fireside sitting, love making excursion,

Ultra Siberian Pant Factory-Omniumgatherum CD Review

2010-03-03T19:30:00.000-08:00

This band must really hate writers. How else can you explain naming your band The Ultra Siberian Pant Factory. Length and depth of syllables aside, the inclusion of Pant and not Pants like it should be is a mother humper. Then on top of it all the band names their album Omniumgatherum. What the fuck is that? Do they realize how many times an album title is used in a typical review? Well I can tell you in this review it will be one, and you just saw.
Trying to define USPFx, that’s the acronym they use, is as difficult as diving how they chose their name. The bands sound is best described as a souped-up combination of Dream Theater and Every Time I Die. Just think of the most insanely progressive bunch of metalcore guys you could ever hope to meet. What makes this band so good is that they eschew the “look at me” masturbatory leanings of a typical progressive band. While the band does play their ass off and they have skills that are unparallel, every note seems to fit the song it is played in. Guitarist George Heathco is beyond phenomenal. While he does show an influence of a Steve Vai or Joe Satriani, he also mixes in the sounds of such modern acts like math metallers Dillinger Escape Plan. His backing members are no slouches either. Both drummer Gus Alvarado and bassist Jack Gordon do the remarkable job in providing a solid foundation for the song while showcasing their own proficiency as well.
The lone drawback is singer Benjamin Cunningham. I am sure that he is a nice guy and calls his mother once a week but his vocals are very off putting. Most of the time he comes across as a bad Corey Taylor. His growls are far from menacing and about as intimidating as Twilight fan club meeting. Unfortunately, his clean vocals are about as good. He does not seem to possess the ability to hit a nice high note, Whenever he does it sounds like he is struggling. I do not mean to pick on Mr. Cunningham but his performance detracts from what his bandmates are playing. A couple of the tracks his voice sounds a lot better so maybe this CD was recorded over a time period to where he was able to progress.
All in all USPFX has released a very interesting record that will appeal to a fair amount of people, Plus, it is so well played that you discover new things everytime to hear it.
http://www.myspace.com/uspfx

Quest For Fire-S/T CD Review

2010-02-03T17:20:00.000-08:00

Quest For Fire? Really? That’s the band name you decided on? I mean why not at least do one of those 12 word names or something with “wolf” in that all the hipsters dig? With a name like this everyone is going to think that you are 1) a group of archeologists doing authentic cro-magnum music, 2) a caveman version of GWAR or 3) a bunch of stoners cranking out fuzz ladened tunes.
Since your album is on Tee Pee Records it is obviously 3.
Moniker aside, Quest For Fire’s self-titled slab is one bodacious piece of work. In this day and age of bands trotting out what they think are throwback sounds and aping bad stereotypes passed down by supposed authoritarians, QfF is a real breath of fresh air. Even though that breath may cause you to fail a drug test.
What makes this album so much better than all the others is this sounds like it could have come out in the early 70’s. Singer Chad Ross sounds like a 2nd generation Amboy Dukes ala “Journey to the Center of Your Mind”. His voice helps weave the tapestry that the rest of the band fills out. The album starts of with “Bison Eyes” a song that would be the byproduct if Josh Homme was born in the early 60’s. Guitarist Andrew Moszynski’s guitar playing propels the band by not playing the same distorted feedback tricks. The band does a nice job of changing tempos and allows “Strange Ways” to borders between a Crazy Horse song and what stoner legend Wino’s definition of stoner music is. For him the meaning is that the music should take you to a place that makes you feel like you are stoned. Mission accomplished. What is remarkable about this song is nearly 8 minute song does not drag at all. “Hawk The Hunts the Walking” unfortunately does and a minute or two should have been trimmed off this near 9-minute opus.
Any review of this band would be best served by mentioning the rhythm section. Drummer Mike Maxymuik and bassist Josh Bauman do a remarkable job in balancing the traditional job of providing a music foundation for the songs and doing some free form jamming of their own. Bauman especially does a nice in making the bass a lead instrument at times.
Quest For Fire’s debut is not merely another slab of 70’s psych/stoner rock. It is shows what is wrong with the milieu of acts that profess themselves to be and how good it should sound when done right.

Overkill-Ironbound CD Review

2010-01-22T17:23:00.001-08:00

Now this is how you kick off a year of metal music. Legendary metal stalwarts Overkill are back and as cliché as it is to type, they are better than ever. Original band members, singer Bobby “Blitz” Ellsworth and bassist D.D. Verni have been making music for 30 years is an impressive accomplishment. When you consider that they have been cranking out thrash metal classics for three decades, the task becomes damn near mind boggling. Ironbound is the band’s 15th studio release and has to be ranked as one of their best. Roaring out of the gates with “The Green and Black”, a nut busting ode to their loyal fans. From the title track to “Endless War” every song is a winner and could be considered a Best Of, just on its’ own. Track after track of thrash metal goodness that makes you want to go and buy a denim jacket and put a huge back patch on it. don’t forget the puffy white sneakers, high tops of course.
Ironbound is the second album for guitarists Derek Tailer and Dave Linsk, as the pair seems to have settled into their roles and have churned out riffs upon riffs that do the job of incorporating the classic thrash elements of the bands beginning and infusing them with a power and crunch of today’s metal.
These 10 tracks of unrelenting metal power and aggressiveness are a true testament to the never ending dedication of Ellsworth and Verni. Even though both guys have been on the business for over a generation, they have never stopped striving to create quality music.

Top 10 Metal Happenings of 2009

2010-01-08T22:01:00.000-08:00

Since there are no more pages left on our collective Adam Lambert wall calendars, let’s all look back and see what the Top 10 Metal Happenings of 2009 were. At least according to me.

10-The launch of www.takebackthehorns.com. This website made it’s entrance onto the information superhighway this past Summer and it bravely tackles an issue that many have ignored. The purpose of this site is to remind people where the \m/ symbol came from and what it stands for. There is nothing more upsetting to a troo metalhead than for them to be watching TV and see someone on American Idol or The Jonas Brothers or someone on the Country Music Awards throw up the hand signal that the honorable Ronnie James Dio had made into metal lore. None other than Dee Snider is behind the site and it was his stint, aka please pay attention to me, on Going Country that he saw John Rich throwing up the horns and knew that this scourge upon our metallic society must be rectified. That and he would appreciate you paying $20 for a t-shirt. Also check out the gallery of photos of troo metallers and poseurs. The pics are priceless as are the comments that follow. Hey, it is the least you could do plus I have yet to make a “we’re not going to take it” joke all throughout this.
No that does not count.

9-No touring Ozzfest this year-Ozzfest is the festival safe haven for metalheads that one could look forward too each year. However lately the wheels have come off. First, there was the spat between Sharon Osbourne and Iron Maiden, where she and her talent less fat daughter threw eggs at the band and had the sound messed with much to the dismay of the 18,00 ticket buyers. Then, they did a tour where the tickets were free since the bands weren’t paid and Sharon got a nice chunk of change from various product placements that turned the already ad heavy show into something out of Minority Report. The story for the cancelling of this years show was that Ozzy would not be touring until he finished his new album. Curious since he has played at least a half dozen times with new guitarist Gus G. The real reason, at least in my opinion, is that Sharon cancelled this years festivals in hopes that the ill-conceived and horribly executed Osbournes Variety Show would take off. Thankfully in never did but one thing we have learned over the years is that Sharon Osbourne is more interested in making herself and her talentless, in rehab before they were 18, kids famous. Since the show flopped as have everything else that have tried to milk from their father’s fame has, at least with no Ozzfest Sharon will not be getting any of the money from the metal community.

8-Clay Guida’s Silver Star UFC 107 shirt- This is the most metal piece of clothing that I have seen that does not involve something from the times of King Arthur. With it’s true throwback look of a red sleeved black jersey that features the likeness of UFC fighter Clay Guida if he was somehow cross pollinated with Iron Maiden icon Eddie. It evens features the fighters name in Maiden lettering. In an extra cool tough, his nickname of The Carpenter is written in same font as Killers. Now having a shirt that takes liberty of a more famous logo is nothing new, Hell every alternative band in the 90’s did it. Why this one is so good is that it treats the source material with respect and not simply as kitsch. Add in the fact that MMA is rapidly becoming one of the most popular sports and that the corresponding clothing lines themselves have become cultural landmarks. This would have been higher but Clay lost his fight and he does come out to “The Taste of Ink” by The Used. He should have used Maiden’s “Die With Your Boots On” it fits his fighting style perfectly.

7-Iron Maiden-Flight 666 the movie-This was the documentary of Iron Maiden’s 2008 Somewhere Back in Time tour. The tour was unique in that the band was flown on their own private plane by lead singer Bruce Dickinson, himself a licensed pilot.
Take that John Travolta.
The film was made by Sam Mendes the same guy that made the tremendous Metal: A Headbanger’s Journey. On Flight he was not on camera but it maintained the same loose and non-intrusive style. While we are treated to nice profiles of the various band members and do get a glimpse of life of the road, what makes this film special is the highlighting of the power of music throughout the world. It is never more prevalent when the band is in South America and you see fans that have waited in line for days and were robbed and brutalized by police just for going to the show. At the end of one show we see a fan still standing in the arena as most of the audience had left. Still in reverence for what he saw and in a moment of pure gratitude, look up to the sky and thank God for what he just witnessed. That scene perfectly represented the unique and unbreakable bond between metal fans and the music.

6-Slayer-World Painted Blood-When legendary bands keep releasing new material it can bee almost disheartening to longtime fans. Usually the new stuff is not even remotely as good as the legendary stuff and fans start wondering is the band is now just going through the motions. Otherwise known as the Paul McCartney theory. With 2006’s Christ Illusion being a spotty record at best, the hopes were low for World Painted Blood. However Slayer showed that they still have the same intensity and power and twisted evilness that made them what they are. All 11 tracks are nutbusters and could easily fit in the timeline of their early hardcore influenced stuff. You can search the site and see my full write up on the album.

5-Megadeth releases a great album and no one cares-If you would have told me 10 years ago that Megadeth would release one of their best records in a decade and no one would buy it, I would have called shenanigans. However, in reality Endgame came out to rave reviews and all of those that did buy it fully agreed. Dave Mustaine created a riff laden album that harkened back to the glory days. His band is a great mixture of youth and experience with former BLS/White Lion bassist James Lomenzo and new guitar god Chris Broderick joining the lone veteran, drummer Shawn Drover. Endgame was one of the angriest and most pissed off records of Mustaine’s career and quickly made everyone forget about the last couple of suspect releases. That is if they heard it. The only reason for the disappointing sales is that fans are fed up with Mustaine’s antics. In the past he has gotten Rotting Christ kicked off a festival because they offended his newly founded Christian beliefs. When he guest hosted Headbangers Ball on the weekend of Dimebag's death he used to opportunity to get himself over. He has a knack for still whining about being kicked out of Metallica over 20 years ago and now writers have to agree not to bring it up. This fall Dave physically threatened a female reporter for bring Metallica up even though he was the one that brought it up. Add in the constant right-wing rhetoric that has filled his endless internet postings and fans have walked away. The last part is curious because Megadeth has always had a political slant to them but political anger from an up and coming band and political anger from a millionaire are two separate things. The tour with Slayer could help reach out to many disaffected fans but his feud with Slayer’s Kerry King may have turned them permanently.

4-Cobalt-Gin-The idea of listening to another two man metal band seems very unappealing. That band “ideal” seems best suited for The White Stripes or The Dresden Dolls. Quick aside , why do two-man bands all have a “the” at the beginning? Anywho, Colorado’s Cobalt have made a remarkable piece if art with its’ release Gin. They have combined the dark, heavy, frantic sounds of black metal with the jam band aspects of the better know dual person groups. What comes out is the mishmash of a very seductive and frightening nihilistic tome. With tracks averaging 7 minutes, Gin allows the listener to be seduced into its’ madness like a Fulci movie. The extreme vocals may be offsetting for some but it helps to emphasize the power in the music when they are used. When they are not used it underscores the change in mood and helps to pull you in. In a recent issue of Decibel, multi-instrumentalist described how Gin is a great driving record. He said that his unit would listen to while driving their Humvee while on duty in Iraq. A more perfect metaphor for this album could not be found than finding solace in a war zone.

3-Mastodon-Crack the Skye- It would have been easy for Mastodon to take the easy way out and release and album of rock radio friendly songs and cash in on the success of their last two albums. Add in the fact that guitarist Brent Hinds had a nearly debilitating accident and Crack The Skye had stinker written all over it. However, the Atlanta quartet turned in one of the most creative albums of the year and will be one of those releases that people will rediscover years from now. Containing only 7 tracks and only one of them clocked in under 5 minutes. The length allows the music to be the showcase along with the lyrical concept revolving around time travel and Russian monk Rasputin, Gone are the screaming vocals and replaced with Hinds near breathless style taking most of those duties. They interlace with instrumental passages that take twists and turns that keep the listener wanting more. Skye is the creative masterpiece that national music writers save their “pants down one handed prose” for Radiohead.

2-Lamb of God-Wrath-Unlike #3, Lamb of God was coming off a very disappointing release in 2006’s Sacrament and many were wondering if the band was all hype. With the release of Wrath the band showed that they were for real and will lay waste to al those that oppose them. From start to finish Wrath is a near masterpiece. It is brutal and fast and technical and catchy, creating a unique mix that normally does not work in concert with the others. Vocalist Randy Blythe spits anger and venom in every lyric and it is never more evident than on “Contractor”. The ode to Blackwater Security is such a pissed off homage that the security firm may want to hire more mercenaries. There is a section after the breakdown in the song that is arguably the heaviest thing ever recorded. If you put this in your CD player it will ensure that nothing else will ever get listened to for the next month. That and it will increase sales of Icy Hot and heating pads for all the ‘banging done to it.

1-Anvil-The Story of Anvil-When I first read that there was going to be a movie on 80’s metal pioneers Anvil I assumed that they were really popular in Canada and never broke through the US market. A music equivalent of Corner Gas if you will. However what we got was one of the most enduring and emotional tale, of two bandmates who have been best friends since high school and now in their 40’s are still trying to make it. On the movie poster there is a quote from some reviewer that referred to this as a “real-life Spinal Tap”. I think that phrase is more of an attempt to be dismissive of the band and their genre. While there are several unintentionally comedic elements, playing to a room of 5 people, the most memorable moments are incredibly emotional and very real. There is a scene in the recoding studio when things are not going well and after borrowing thousands of dollars from his sister, singer/guitarist Lips Kudlow almost buckled under the pressure and you can see his resolve to continue fight with the his desire to quit. The film is a testament to two things, the guys never ending friendship and the fact that even though there have been bumps in the road, sometimes really big bumps, they never gave up.
An unintended side effect of this movie is that there are many upset wives and girlfriends that had significant others ready to put down their instruments, are now reinvigorated and are now watching them full of vigor and desire thanks to Anvil. That fact alone is more metal than ‘87 Hetfield.

Skeletonwitch-Breathing the Fire CD Review

2009-12-12T17:02:00.000-08:00

They are coming out of the woodwork. Like any genre, when something gets remotely popular they come crawling out of the dark like roaches. Even the minute movement known as neo-thrash, it has had the same effect. A style that is supposed to invoke the legendary sound of the bands from the 80’s has now become a moniker for bland guitar playing, lazy songwriting, and mundane vocals. While Skeletonwitch does not fall into that undesirable category, there newest release Breathing the Fire is precipitously close. The band showcases some very nice guitar playing that retains the thin but heavy sound that came out of the San Fran sound of the 80’s. What is not there is creative riffs. Fast gallops with the most obvious of changes do not do this band any favors. You can tell where it song is going because of the predictability of it. One thing this band does differently than there throwback contemporaries is the vocal style. Chance Garnett style is more of the gruff black metal style with some growling added in. At first it may seem it seems off putting but that is due to its’ uniqueness. When used correctly on “Stand Fight and Die” it adds to the power of the track and helps to emphasize the guitars.
The band chose to use a more raw sound this time. While the drums do get a tad lost at times, the overall feel adds to the reminiscing of the style they are imploring.
This is not necessarily a sophomore jinx for the band, but they with the unbridled success of the their debut, coupled with the shortcomings of this release, this had to be a home run and sadly it is maybe a double.

Slayer-World Painted Blood-CD Review

2009-11-11T22:00:00.000-08:00

You know its is a good day to be a metalhead when a new Slayer CD comes out. World Painted Blood is the latest offering from the “troo” kings of metal. Slayer is a band that has managed to stay true to what they have done since day one. A point that is more impressive considering that day one was over two decades ago. There are no Load’s or Turbo’s or Risk’s in this bands’ discography.

It starts off with the title track and guitarist Jeff Hanneman’s riffing that lets you know right off the bat that this is a Slayer album. Hanneman is key to this album since he took a much greater songwriting effort than in the past. Plus his playing style has always come from a more punk or hardcore style than Kerry King’s and at times the sound does harkens back to Hell Awaits or Haunting the Chapel. DO NOT be mistaken in thinking that Slayer is just on the neo-thrash bandwagon. Which would be ironic since the helped invent the genre but nonetheless.

Naturally with all Slayer albums this one is filled with songs of love, politics, and the Dahli Lama living in exile. I’m just kidding, it is filled with songs on the self-destruction of mankind, murder, and other fair that could only come out of the demented mind of Kerry King. You have “Snuff” a lovely ditty about a snuff filmmaker that features some of the trademark back and forth soloing. “Beauty Through Order” is a song about the incredibly insane Countess Bathory. The band channels its’ inner U2 with “Americon” and its’ opinion n the war in the middle east. When you hear the lines “it’s all about the mother fucking oil” you figure out where the band is coming from. Now it would not be a Slayer album without a shot at religion and “Not of this God” is a hell of a shot.

There are some drawbacks though. World Painted Blood is produced by Greg Fidelman with an executive producer credit to Rick Rubin. Rubin has been producing the band for a longtime and is the reason that Dave Lombardo’s drums have always sounded so much better than anyone in their genre. Plus, I doubt that Rick spent much time in the studio, his credit is more of a result of him owning the label Mr. Fidelman was the one behind the knobs so all praise/fault fall on his shoulders. The drums sound great as does Tom Araya’s vocals. You could nitpick about the guitars a tad but whatever. The big problem is that this sounds remarkably like Death Magnetic the album that Fidelman worked on before this. It’s not that it is sounds bad it’s just not as good as it should be.

World Painted Blood is a shot across the bough to all those that thought Slayer has gone the way of AC/DC and just recorded a typical album. Slayer has made an album that while not as good as South of Heaven or Reign on Blood, is still better than 90% of what is out there. This is a band that is reclaiming their throne from all of the up and comers that have laid siege to it.

TNA Wrestling signs Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff

2009-10-27T17:27:00.000-07:00

I think I’m gonna be sick.
That was the first thought that went through my mind upon hearing that TNA had signed both Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff. TNA has made nice strides over the past couple of years and seemed to be on the verge of pushing most of its’ young talent; Matt Morgan., Hernandez, newly acquired Desmond Wolfe (ex-ROH Champion Nigel McGuiness) and the Motor City Machine Guns.
So why in the blue hell would a company spend a big bag of cash on two guys who were the antithesis of pushing new talent? Bischoff built up WCW on the backs of the then over the hill Hogan, and Scott Hall and Kevin Nash two guys that left WWF and were starting to make the downhill slide, and that was over 10 years ago. During his tenure, Bischoff only created two new stars, the Giant aka the Big Show, and Goldberg. However, future starts like Steve Austin, Chris Jericho, Rey Mysterio, Eddie Guerrero, Booker T, and Chris Benoit were all stuck under the glass ceiling.
Now Hogan’s lack of working with new talent is legendary. Especially if they are deemed “too small” in his eyes. This was the reason at Wrestlemania IX when the great Bald One would only face Yokozuina and not Bret Hart. There are plenty of other examples out there, but most disturbing is when he uses his influence to perpetuate this. Back in the WCW days he convinced a young and exceedingly popular Goldberg to not do a program with another young wrestler that Hogan deemed too small. That of course was Chris Jericho and now his is one of the best of all-time and Goldberg is hosting third rate car shows on an obscure cable channels. Even in his last run with WWE Hogan could not put his ego aside enough to do the job to Shawn Michaels.
What the actual roles each person will have on TNA is still vague, but Bischoff is rumored to be there only for his TV expertise and to try and get TNA another show. When TNA resigned with Spike last year there was a clause that allowed them to put a show on another network if Spike passed on it. TNA has been trying to get a show for their Knockouts division, the X-Division and a televised version of the very entertaining Spin Cycle web show. In that regard Bischoff and his partner Jason Hervey do have the expertise but if you look at what they have done, people may want to ease off the praise. The big claims to fame for them are reality shows starring Ted Nugent, Scott Baio, and Billy Ray Cyrus. The biggest network that these shows were on is VH-1 and while that shows has big name recognition there ratings are not that impressive. If the can get a new TNA show on the air it better be on a bigger channel. Putting a wrestling show on a channel that runs marathons of 100 greatest countdowns or which skank will sleep with which left over star from the 80’s is not a good thing.
Now Hogan’s role is still a mystery. Part of this is to hype his new book, I will not, and another is that he just had a HUGE divorce and could use the cash. The curious part is that Hogan and Bischoff have put together a tour of Australia, Hulkamania, ironically in competition with TNA’s upcoming tour of the land down under. If Hogan comes in as an ambassador type role similar to what Ric Flair did in ROH, then that would be great. His name recognition would be a huge asset and having him at certain PPV’s to greet fans and sign autographs would be phenomenal as would having Hogan putting over TNA’s new talent over as the next big things. Pro Wrestling Torch’s Wade Keller came up with the idea of Hogan being a babyface commissioner. That sounds perfect as it gets him on the air but keeps him away from the ring. Now if he comes in and legdrops Morgan, Samoa Joe , and Desmond Wolfe, then Dixie Carter needs to bend over and kiss her ass goodbye. TNA has set themselves up as the alternative to WWE and while they have brought in the occasional ex-WWE superstar, most of their talent is homegrown. Letting a washed up 55-year old who can barely walk come in and bury your talent will end the company faster than getting kicked off of Spike.
TNA fans have spent countless hours defending the company and some of their curious decisions. For all of TNA’s bad decisions, the shining lights of Joe, Knockouts, X-Division, MCMG, AJ Styles and others have kept that bad hidden in the shadows.
Of course it may have blinded us from reality.

Sammy Hagar-Cosmic Universal Fashion-CD Review

2009-10-14T18:41:00.000-07:00

Well, you have to hand it to the Red Rocker, he refuses to let Father Time slow him down. He headlined last summer’s festival circuit and got together with former Van Halen bandmate Michael Anthony, guitar whiz Joe Satriani, and Red Hot drummer Chad Smith and released the excellent Chickenfoot CD. While many contemporaries at his age would be gasping after such a heavy workload, Sammy Hagar decides to release a new solo album.

Cosmic Universal Fashion is a bewildering piece of work that is one part admirable, one part lazy and one part smells of contract fulfillment. The album kicks off in a very different direction that will shock diehard fans. Several years ago on VH-1’s 100 Greatest Hard Rock Bands, Hagar fawned over his love and admiration of Tool and how they were influenced what he was doing. Back then that statement was laughable but the first 3 tracks reflect that sentiment.

Almost.

Each of these songs reflect a much darker feeling and sound that you have to admire the attempt even though you are thinking that Sammy must be singing for his son’s band. Musically they are fine where they hit a snag is lyrically as Sammy is just not adept at writing these types of songs. “Peephole” is a tremendous song on both fronts but gets bogged down by some clunky wording and phrasing. It deals with kidnapping and child sex abuse and could be compared to Aerosmith’s “Janie’s Got a Gun” in how it combined a great song with a not very pop friendly subject.

Unfortunately it all goes haywire after that. Up comes “Loud” a below average party song that sounds like it was written the night before the recording session. It’s tepidness is soon tested by the equally bland “24365” and “Switch on the Light”. Maybe they all sound better after sampling some of his Cabo Wabo Tequilla. You will need shots of said alcohol when you hear his version of “Fight For Your Right to Party”. Let’s put it this way, as bad as it sounds in you head right now, multiply that by 10 and you may be close.

It mercifully ends with a live acoustic version of “Dreams” a hit from his days in Van Halen.

After listening you can’t help but think that either Hagar should have saved the first couple of songs in the vault until he had an album’s worth or just put them out as an EP. By mixing the two drastically different styles together it ruins that impact of the first half which serves as a downer for the second part.

The Black Crowes-Before the Frost CD Review

2009-10-14T18:21:00.000-07:00

The Black Crowes has just released Before the Frost/Until the Freeze, a double album sort of. This innovative release is the hard copy of Before the Frost…, with an online code for …Until the Freeze. The band did this as a thank you to their fans for a 20 year career, so far.

Both albums were recorded live in studio in front of a small crowd. This really gives the songs a great natural sound augmented by the smattering sounds of an appreciative audience What is interesting is when I added both albums to iTunes Before the Frost was labeled “blues” while Until the Freeze was “rock”. However there is no split personality on these albums, just the same high quality, pun intended, blues based rock with an ever increasing acoustic sound. That is not to say that their jam band appeal is gone, that is evident on “Been a Long Time”. Now the 7-minutes jam are sharing space with a more acoustic/country sound on “Appaloosa” and “Houston Don’t Dream About Me’. The later a beautiful ballad very reminiscent of the driving country songs of the 70’s.

The most curious, surprising, and arguably the best track is “I Ain’t Hiding”, a disco song.

Yes I said a disco song.

While the chorus does have a rock feel to it, this is a disco song and it is fucking awesome. I dare anyone to not start dancing in the cubicle, car seat, couch, or whatever, when they hear this track. I don’t know where the inspiration for this came from or why it took the band this long to record it, I am just glad that they did.

Another interesting track is “Aimless Peacock”, a 7-minute instrumental that is a cross between Appalachian folk and ”Norwegian Wood”.

There will be many griping that this is a good two-disc set with only one disc worth of great music that may be true. Since the second disc is free and a good Black Crowes CD is better than most all is well.

Judas Priest-A Touch of Evil Live CD Review

2009-07-23T20:40:00.000-07:00

Judas Priest’s new live CD, A Touch of Evil Live, is a nice little payoff for diehard fans. The 11 tracks that make up the release are all songs that have not been previously recorded live. This is saying something considering that the band has something like 30 live albums in their career. Not really, they only have five but three of those have come out in the last decade.
All kidding aside the content is a little uneven. The listing has two songs from 2008’s Nostradamus, an ambitious yet uneven release. One could argue that the two selected, “Death” and “Prophecy”, where the wrong ones. Those mistakes are quickly offset with renditions of “Beyond the Realms of Death” and “Eat Me Alive”. One of the supposed highlights is “Painkiller”. The original is a massive Teutonic slab of metal greatness that showed the band incorporating the heavier styles of bands from the early 90’s that were influenced by them. However, singer Ron Halford’s voice sounds horrible on this version. His attempts of recreating the graveling vocal style sound woefully inadequate and if anyone else would have done this they would be getting mocked. However, in the same song and throughout the whole album his voice still sounds amazing when he sings. A lesson to all the kids out there, if you take care of your voice your voice will take care of you.
Also noteworthy is the drumming of Scott Travis. It was his debut on the Painkiller album that helped to boost their sound and bombast. It is refreshing to see him still having the same effect 15 years later.
While A Touch of Evil Live is a nice attempt of filling in holes for diehard fans. The set is too specific that it comes off like a cash grab than a sincere release.

Such Hawks Such Hounds-DVD Review

2009-07-15T17:06:00.000-07:00

Such Hawks Such Hounds

DVD Review

In the overflowing racks of DVD’s at your local record store, the subject of Stoner rock has been neglected. The void has been filled with the release of Such Hawks Such Hounds. The film is the culmination of three years work by John Srebalus. The first time director seeks to expose one hard rock’s many subgenres. While any documentary on stoner is very welcomed Srebalus delivered a very disjointed and confusing result.

It starts off with a timeline from Sabbath and a nice piece on Pentagram. The American band is one of those underground influences that get sadly overlooked. Then the timeline becomes almost inconsequential as there is a piece on Earthless, a band who was not born when Pentagram was formed. This is nothing against that band as their live piece is outstanding. Not to mention bassist Mario Rubalcaba’s explanation of the “cosmic nod”.

The film continues the same format with a look back and then a piece on a modern band. While that maybe acceptable, what is not is some of the bands. There is Fatso Jetson, a blues band complete with a harmonica playing front man. The fact that they refer to themselves as a blues band should have been clue number one for the director. However, when guitarist Mario Lalli says “a clean tremolo can sound so evil that it makes Black Sabbath sound like Peggy Lee” should have been the proverbial final straw. They seem to be included because they were signed to SST Records. Srebalus seems to play up the alt-rock and punk influence more than it really is. Case in point is the inclusion of uber-producer Jack Endino and Mudhoney’s Mark Arn.

Their inclusion would not have been so bad but it comes at the expense of Wino. Wino is generally regarded as the grandfather of stoner rock and after watching this film you would not get that impression. It is sickening that the director was able to land him and then to not fully expand on his influence. Then the director chooses to spend more time of Arik Roper and others on “the art of stoner rock”.

Maddening.

That being said there are several good parts to Such Hawks. The classic album Jerusalem by Sleep is given its’ just due. The 58-minute one song album is covered in detail from the long and tiring recording to its mishandling by the record label, London Records. The label was so confused on what to do; the band had broken up by the time it was released. The groups that rose from its’ ashes, OM and High on Fire, were both featured extensively.

One of the more interesting things Srebalus did is touch on the pot influence of stoner rock. What is curious are how many bands did not like the tag because they thought it gave them an unfair stigma. Also mentioned is how all the bands know they will never “make it” and the sacrifices that they make to keep playing.

Subject’s aside the film is not well produced. It feels disjointed for the most part and the timeline graphic used never seemed to matter. There were many points brought up, like how important Man’s Ruin records were, that were never followed up on or further explained. The biggest complaint is that they never did a job on explaining what “stoner rock” is. There are some cursorily attempts at the beginning but never developed. I have read Wino’s explanation that stoner rock is the type of music that makes you feel like you are stoned. To me that is the perfect genre definition. Of course if Wino was given more time we may have heard that in the film.

Michael Jackson's dead and I don't care

2009-06-26T13:15:00.000-07:00

On Thursday June 25, 2009, the King of Pop did his last crotch grab and moonwalked into the Great Unknown. While his abrupt demise was rather shocking, the outpouring of flowery prose for him in his wake is mind boggling. This is a man after all who had been dealing with child sex abuse charges for the better part of two decades. When was the last time that he had a positive story written about him? Don’t forget that before his pedophilia circus started he was labeled as an anti-Semitic for his idiotic lyrics on the HIStory album.
What are most disturbing are the constant comparisons to Elvis. You cannot compare these two in any way. Undoubtedly Elvis has his problems, but you cannot compare pills, peanut butter banana sandwiches, and sequined jumpsuits to giving cancer patients “tickle juice” and sleeping with them. That is not to say that MJ was not a huge pop star but the chasm between the two is almost as big as E was in his final days. Elvis changed the world, Michael mad a bunch of suburban kids wear zippered jackets.
You could in fact argue that MJ was the first media creation of MTV. The upstart video channel had slowly crept its’ way in suburbia and become the new source of pop culture for American teens. Then in 1983 along comes “Beat It” a mini-movie in which, now laughably, a young Michael Jackson gets involved with a gang fight. Add in the much underrated guitar solo by Eddie Van Halen and you have gold. After that every one of his videos became an event. Of course that was in the day when MTV played music videos so many of you have no idea what I am talking about.
As great as Thriller was, the circus that became his life afterwards clearly over shadows it. Yes, “Billie Jean” was great but hanging your kid out of a 3rd story window not so much. Of course that kid was born from a crazy French nurse that he paid to conceive him.
Who didn’t like the duet “Say, Say, Say’ with Paul McCartney? Of course that fact that MJ’s love interest in said video was his own whack-a-do sister LaToya should have been the first sign that someone was not right with the gloved one. Of course Mikey was nice enough to buy the rights to the Beatles copyrights out from under McCartney helped to show what a great friend he was.
He had quickly gone from being a lauded to celebrity to a joke, a popular joke nonetheless, in a short span. Then in 1987 came the release of Bad, a musical attempt to prove his “manliness”. First, the video for the title track with a young Wesley Snipes, again shows MJ get tough with some street hoodlums.
Seriously.
Then came the 159 crotch grabs in the “Way You Make Me Feel” and his overall cred was gone. While many still bought his albums his trip from lauded musician to late 80’s version of Lindsay Lohan was complete in only 4 short years.
That wing of celebrity is where he resided until his death. He was a freakshow with a circus n his backyard. He is a bridge of underage sex abusers between Roman Polanski and R. Kelly. To ignore that last two decades of his life because some have fond memories of unwrapping the Thriller LP at Christmas 25 years ago is wrong and ignorant. Is there going to be the same outpour when O.J. dies? He was one of the greatest running backs of all time. So what if he was charged in the murders of his wife that he had beaten previously and Ron Goldman. He was found innocent by a jury just like MJ. Just ignore the fact that anyone with half a brain thinks they are both guilty, except for a small group of disillusioned fans.
With all this good publicity Michael Jackson should have died years ago. You know, that would have bee fine with me.

Lamb of God-Verizon Wireless Theater 4/24/09

2009-04-27T22:12:00.000-07:00

It sure does smell in here.
That was my prevailing thought standing in a packed Verizon Wireless Theater, waiting for Lamb of God to take the stage. The legions of metal heads had packed the venue for the No Fear Energy Tour. The odor of two thousand metallic fans sweating out a sugar coma inducing energy drink was WAY too prevalent. Apparently, the scumbags that run the Verizon stuck the $5 “service fee” in their pocket and could not be bothered to turn the AC on.
In these tough economic times, getting to see a package bill that also included As I Lay Dying, Children of Bodom, Municipal Waste, and God Forbd, was a choice easily made.
However enjoyable the openers were, everyone was there to see Lamb of God. In support if their blistering 2009 release, Wrath, the Richmond, Virginia quintet were the Horsemen of the ensuing Apocalypse. They came out swinging with the first two tracks from Wrath, “In Your Words” and “Set to Fail”. The amped up crowd was in a moshing mood all night and stepped it up a notch for the headliners. However the crowd on the floor was so overcrowded that it looked more like a plate if vibrating balls than a pit. Local underground legend Mike Haaga of Dead Horse got a shoutout and if you didn’t like LoG before that, the fact that they listen to Dead Horse should make you a fan.
Prevalent all throughout the show was the impressive and imposing presence of lead singer Randy Blythe. He walks the stage like a lion, pacing back and forth trying to find a way out of the cage. On stage he is tethered by the longest mic cable since the 1970’s. No wireless mic for him. He has an intimidating yet engaging aura around him that makes it impossible to turn away.
The 60-minute set came to a close, without the now played out fake encore, with “Redneck” and “Black Label”. The former is an angry piece of inter-band feuding, and the latter a now classic that features the Wall of Death.
What is the Wall of Death, you may ask? Well, it is the evolution of the mosh pit where the traditional circular pattern is now two clearly divided sides that charge at one another, en mass. The amazing aspect is that this incredibly violent and injury causing spectacle is met with cheers and high fives by all the participants.
As the satisfied crowd filed out of their seats, spontaneous chants of Lamb of God, Lamb of God rang out. Fellow concert goers joined in with their sometimes shirtless cohorts. We had all just experienced a triumphant metal moment and not even the monsoon that was waiting outside could damper our spirits.

Queensryche-American Soldier CD Review

2009-04-21T16:58:00.001-07:00

The prospects of another concept album from Queensryche will most assuredly cause many a headbanger to roll their eyes. However, American Soldier is a truly unique album in its’ subject matter and in its’ execution. On this album, lead singer/lyricist Geoff Tate conducted several interviews with veterans to get their perspective and stories. He then took these tales and molded them into American Soldier. What comes out is an emotional yet, flawed tribute to the members of the United States of American armed forces. The album’s tracks run the gambit of a soldier’s life. It opens with “Sliver” and the feeling of basic training complete with a drill sergeant’s barking. It then segue’s into battle hardened words on “Unafraid” and “Hundred Mile Stare”. The former is unique in that the main lyrics are the spoken experience of a vet.

The album tackles the very complicated emotions of what happens to a soldier when one of his troops goes down. The gauntlet of emotions running from guilt to sadness to regret to hopelessness are tackled on “If I Were King”, “Man Down”, and “Remember Me”

Geoff Tate’s daughter Emily makes an appearance on “Home Again” where she sings the role of a daughter whose father is at war. .The emotional extra of the father-daughter duet is underscored with the lyrical content of a family making sacrifices.

You cannot make one complaint about how the subject matter is treated. I was a little skeptical at first but the band does a tremendous job of showing the broad spectrum that is the life of a soldier. While the words are top notch the music is lacking. At times it seems to work harmoniously with the words but for the most part it comes off as cliché. It is a shame because this had the ear markings of becoming another landmark album. The other drawback to this album is that with the heavy emotional weight, this will not be something you pop in with regularity.

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Mastodon-Crack the Sky CD Review

2009-04-21T16:54:00.001-07:00

It is a daunting task following up a classic breakthrough album. Many bands take the course of making a copy of what got them where they are. Or worse make an album that they think people will like. Atlanta’s Mastodon have decided to make an album that they like and what comes out is a 7-track, 45 minute monument of heavy prog rock greatness.

With the help of producer Brendan O’Brien, Crack the Sky is an album that will slowly unfolds, revealing things with every listen.

The story is a bizarre tour de force about a quadriplegic that travels through the astral plains and is returned to his body with the help of crazed Russian monk Rasputin.

I know, not that same old story again.

Musically, all four members of Mastodon are on their game. The rhythm section has always been solid with the drumming of Brann Dailor, whose drum fills are burgeoning of legendary, and vocalist/bassist Troy Sanders. Sanders has really elevated his performance this time out. These two work as not just a foundation but as partners with the guitar histrionics of Brent Hinds and Bill Kellihor. The pairs ability to play intricate yet engaging riffs that make the most advanced of MIT shredders green with envy.

Crack the Sky does not have a “single” like its’ predecessors but every track is engrossing. From opener “Oblivion” with its’ hypnotic vocal lines all the way to closer “The Last Baron”, the band does not sit still. “Last Baron” is an 11-minute epic that flows seamlessly changing emotion, power, and feel several times throughout.

The songs are not overly busy or pretentious like Dream Theater, but quicksand-like. They slowly pull you in until there is nothing you can do to resist.

Crack the Sky is not an album that will grab you from the start. With each listening, you more and more involved with it, picking up new things along the way. Most albums are not worth the effort. This one definitely is.

Lamb of God-Wrath CD Review

2009-04-01T20:01:00.001-07:00

Fucking Awesome.

Those two simple words are the perfect description for Wrath, the new release from Lamb of God.

Wrath is a return to form that allows the Richmond, Virginia quintet to reclaim its’ crown as the new kings of metal. The album sets you up for disappointment with opening track “The Passing”. The soft instrumental lulls you into regretting your purchase but what it does is set you up for 10 tracks of knockout punches. “Set to Fail” should serve as a warning to all those that thought the band had lost their way on the disappointing Sacrament. With Chris Adler’s blast beats, the twin guitars weaving monstrously meaty hooks, topped off by Randall Blythe’s screaming bloody hell. His vocals are best described as the crazy man that wears The World is Going to End sandwich board has finally snapped and grabbed a microphone. The combination of anger, hatred, frustration, and rebellion, acts as an intoxicant and grabs onto the listener and gleefully throws them into the mosh pit.

The best example of how great Wrath, is on the track “Contractor”. Starting with an opening Yee Ha, the track is a lyrical attack on the controversial Blackwater Security and its cowboy attitude. It starts off with machine gun riffs and Blythe spitting lyrics just as rapidly. It slows down to the heaviest of chugs before it launches into a full-on aural assault that peaks with what can only be described as metal Viagra. If this song does not give you a musical boner then you need to put this CD down and go buy the new Jonas Brothers.

Lamb of God has worked its’ way up from struggling band on a tiny label, to headliner and the face of the American metal scene. Wrath serves as a postmark on their journey to ascendancy,

Fucking Awesome.

Set to Fail video

Stuck Mojo-The Great Revival- Worst CD of the Year

2009-03-31T15:13:00.000-07:00

It is insulting to think that one word could sum up an album. With the new CD from rap-metal pioneers Stuck Mojo the one word is obvious. Laughable.
Decibel Magazine has already given The Great Revival the honorable distinction of being the first album of the New Year to earn a 0. As in 0 out of 10. Now I may not be a math major but that is not good. After popping The Great Revival in the CD player their opinion was quickly confirmed.
There are so many thing wrongs with this album I do not think that my computers’ keyboard could take all the pounding. Is the world really waiting for a new CD from ANY band playing rap metal? Judging by the absence of their former competitors I say no.
The bands sound is so formulaic that you could replicate with any high school garage band and a good producer. Rich Ward’s distorted guitar playing a generic heavy riff with Lord Byron’s average rapping making the most obvious of rhymes. The band has added in Ward’s voice singing harmonics, for some reason. They have also opened the gender doors of suckiness by getting Christine Cook to contribute backing vocals. When you hear her voice you realize how bad the two guys actually are. The vocal trifecta is achieved on “Friends” with Lord Byron rappping the verses; Cook comes in and does harmonics with Ward on the choruses, This is all done over a song whose lyrical content of being best friends is on the level of Sesame Street.
The track that sums up the awfulness of this experience can be summed up in “Country Road”. Yes, you read that right a rap metal version of the John Denver classic. The song is an ode to Rich Ward’s mother and while the intent is admirable the execution is not. It starts with some personal lyrics from Rich to his Mom and his says he is going to sing her favorite song and then he starts singing the famous chorus except he changes the location to North Carolina. Ironic, that as he is singing about mountains his voice is as flat as a prairie. While that may get John Denver to start spinning in his grave, when Lord Byron starts rapping his verse, John’s revolutions increase. It is all capped off with more false endings than the Lords of the Rings, ending with a “choir” on the final chorus.
The atrociousness of The Great Revival is beyond my vocabulary and for that I am grateful. It is a horrible album that only serves as a reminder of what a waste the rap metal movement fad was.

I wish Ozzy would have died

2009-03-06T18:53:00.000-08:00

I wish Ozzy had died.
While that sentence is somewhat shocking, it is highly unoriginal. Back in 1978 the brilliant Marc Jacobson wrote the same thing about Bob Dylan after having to sit through the horrendous film Renaldo & Clara. The impetuous for said line is that the artist, now being Ozzy, has done something so god awful that it has forever stained his legacy. We would be waxing poetic about Black Sabbath (the band and the album), Diary of a Madman, and No More Tears. Instead we are dealing with this drivel.
Now, what could Mr. Osbourne have done that I would wish his untimely demise?
How about the new Fox show Osbournes Reloaded.

This “wacky” new variety show puts the Osbourne clan in funny and hilarious situations that the whole country will enjoy. Not really, but I am almost certain that there is a Fox publicity memo that says the same thing. Instead it is a recycling of bad Candid Camera bits that will further make Ozzy the bumbling idiot he became on his families reality show. What it really is, is a statement of a father that loves his family and does not have enough balls or self respect to tell them no. His family consists of his wife Sharon, and children Jack, Kelly, and the never seen Amy.
Sharon is his manager and the sole reason why he is alive today. She found him when he was at his bottom and resurrected him to iconic status. She also created Ozzfest which helped metal in it’s’ resurgence. Unfortunately this is not the only side to her. She and Kelly ruined an Ozzfest show by throwing eggs at Iron Maiden on their last day of the tour. While this sounds like tour hijinks, it was not since she had her stooge, I mean tour manager Dave, fuck with their sound all during the set. This was retaliation for Maiden singer Bruce Dickinson saying that reality shows are stupid. Nice of her to let her own feud ruin the show that 18,000 people paid to see. Other people’s feelings are never her concern as she has verbally and physically assaulted other bands managers knowing full well that if they would have retaliated their clients’ career would be over. Music aside, she has repeatedly failed in her many attempts to become famous in her own right. She had a talk show, canceled A stint on a talent show in which she plays second fiddle to David Hasselhoff. Jeez no humiliation there. Oh, there was the show where she played a Charm School teacher to a bunch of trashy whore reality TV losers. Apparently someone at VH1 thought that Sharon would be a good role model for these future Hooters waitresses in helping turn themselves around. It was a rather curious choice since Sharon has a mouth worse than a dozen drunken sailors and she slept with the guitar player in her husband’s band.
Let’s not forget about his kids, Jack and Kelly. The only thing these two kids have ever accomplished is completing rehab. Jack is interesting because he repeatedly said that he did not want the fame during their initial MTV reality show, He hated the fame so much he guest starred in countless sitcoms. After his stint in rehab, he admirably got into shape and fancied himself a daredevil on Adrenaline Junkie.
His sister Kelly is a little different. She was a little more forthright in her desire to be famous. She recorded two crappy albums and even a stunt duet with her father on “Changes” could not save her. She outdid her brother by going to rehab twice. I smell sibling rivalry. Supposedly she is a model now. I don’t know about that since she was always a little bit of a plumper, not that there is anything wrong with that. In fact that was the only aspect about her that I liked.
So there you have it, a father that has accomplished what only a scant few have. A legendary recording career that has spanned 3 decades and has created a legacy that will live forever. Then there is the family of leeches and failures that cannot be happy with being rich and wealthy. The jealousy of their father has spurned them to use him and destroy the same legacy that they are gleaming off of.
Yeah, I do wish that Ozzy had died.

Scott Weiland-"Happy" in Galoshes CD Review

2008-12-01T19:34:00.001-08:00

If you look up “successful in spite of oneself” in the dictionary, there should be a picture of Scott Weiland next to it. The singer/rehab devotee is fresh off a reunion tour with his Stone Temple Pilot bandmates, has just released his second solo effort “Happy” In Galoshes. I did not use eagerly waited because after his first solo effort only the most die-hard of fans would be wanting. Apparently Scott’s new found sobriety has unleashed his creative juices and we are all the benefactor. “Happy” In Galoshes is the perfect example of what a solo album should be. It is free of limits and Scott has allowed himself to create songs free of any preconception. It smartly kicks off with “Missing Cleveland”, a solid rocker that will satisfy the longing pallet of his STP fans. “Blind Confusion” has an 80’s new wav swagger to it that would make Molly Ringwald pogo. All throughout the album there are quirky pop songs “Paralysis” or a Beach Boys inspired chorus on “Beautiful Day” that can only come from an artist free of any restraint.

There is one effort he should have resisted. A peculiar cover of “Fame” with superstar DJ Paul Oakenfold. Unfortunately, Scott seems to ape Bowie’s vocals and all Oakenfold seems to do is turn the track into a glorified remix track.

There is a special 2-disc edition available that includes 7 extra songs. One of them is a cover of The Smiths “Reel Around the Fountain”. Also included in this edition is a coupon for a free t-shirt. This version is only available at Best Buy and it will run you and extra $7 or so,

“Happy” In Galoshes shows why Scott Weiland was such and important figure in the grunge explosion and points to a future of unlimited possibilities.

XX Teens-Welcome to Goon Island-CD Reviw

2008-11-19T20:37:00.001-08:00

Listening to XX Teens debut album, Welcone to Goon Island, it is quite obvious that they are British. This 5-man band of London college friends have crafted a collection of songs so delectable that you want to call your travel agent and book a trip to Goon Island. The soiree kicks off with “The Way We Were”, a song that will satisfy your inner Christopher Walken with its’ abundance of cowbell. Bovine inspired musical instruments aside, what makes this a good album is the bands willingness to do what they want. The songs change course more times than Oprah’s weight. Iggy Pop is channeled on “My Favorite Hat” and “Darlin” combines steel drums with big horns and James Brown’s “Funky Drummer”. The odd duck in this menagerie is “Sun Comes Up”, a sitar laden trip fest that feels more suited for a rave.

One peculiar aspect to Goon Island is that there are no choruses. The band has been able to circumvent the traditional song structure while still rockin’ out. One other aspect that needs to be given credit is producer/engineer Ross Orton who lets the bands frenetic sound come to life. He is also credited with the off-kilter drumming that punctuates each song.

TNA Wrestling -Screws up again

2008-11-13T16:54:00.000-08:00

Recently, TNA Wrestling fired two of its’ agents, Pat Kearney and Glen Gilberti. The company stated that both agents, although popular and good workers, needed to be relieved of duty so they could maintain their roster of wrestlers. TNA stated that they had 60 workers under contract and all were needed. That sentence sums up what is wrong with this company. TNA is so in love with the idea of being a WWE substitute that they would rather keep non-necessary guys employed while two incredibly helpful ones were dismissed.
Lets’ start with why both guys should have stayed. For the most part, TNA’s still has a young and inexperienced roster so having two guys that could help them is invaluable. Having a 3rd party get across the story behind a match with the parties involved can only help the end product. Of course once you examine most of the booking decisions a good end product may not be what TNA after. Also, consider that a year ago TNA decided to stop paying for transportation from the airport; a decent chuck of change, employee morale may not be the highest. While everyone can appreciate them watching the bottom line, eliminating small things like free transportation really does not help.
Now the real reason why they should have not been fired, there are way too many wrestlers under contract that these guys should not have been canned. TNA stated that there are 60 workers under contract and that alone is a very puzzling number since every episode of Impact seems to have the same 20-25 guys on it. Looking at the Superstar Roster on their website, you can easily find 6 people that could and should go. The most obvious is Scott Steiner. If this was 10 years or even 5 years ago I could understand paying him but now he is totally useless. When he re-emerged two weeks ago he could not even run down the ramp. Then there was his crazy, funny, even though it should not have been, promo from last week. He managed to bury the TNA originals in only 5 minutes, rendering the past month a waste.

Awesome.
Second to go should be Kip James. This guy is almost as useless as Steiner. Everyone knows him as Billy Gunn and that is all he will ever be. TNA should see if he and BG James, aka Road Dogg, can get a final run as the New Age Outlaws. While BG is the other backstage agent, it would be best for everyone if one or both were gone. Next on the chopping block should be the Rock N Rave Connection. Now I know Jimmy Rave was in ROH and all those fanboys would be in an uproar but in TNA he has looked like crap. He really needs to hit the gym and drop about 10 pounds. Along with him is Lance Rock Hoyt. While he may be big he has never connected in the ring the way that TNA needs him to. With Lance it is time to cut bait. Speaking of bait, I love Shark Boy but he is best used by periodic appearances that could easily be worked out. The other on-air talent that could be trimmed is the backstage personnel. They have Jeremy Borash and Lauren Thompson essentially doing the same job. While it makes since to get rid of one I would say both. To feel the vacant position I would move Don West there. This is not a knock on his color commentary but by moving him to the backstage you bring Jim Cornette to the mic. With Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett playing leading roles there is no need for Jimbo to be the commissioner. Plus you can have West do a bi-weekly spot were he reprises his Home Shopping Network past and do crazy deals on TNA merch.
I know that this looks like a lot of stuff that should be done instead of firing two guys working backstage but that is the point. TNA continually makes bad decision after bad decision and thinks one finger can fix the Swiss cheese dike.

Trapt-Only Through the Pain CD Review

2008-11-12T22:21:00.000-08:00

Very few times do you run a cross an album title that sums your feelings up perfectly. The latest from Trapt, Only Through the Pain, fits that bill to a T. The only way I was able to finish this review was to persevere though the pain. Let me tell you there were lots and lots of pain involved in this process. Pain is the 3^rd album following in the post grunge, alt-rock, pop metal vein of previous releases. If that Wikipedia inspired description does not help, the band plays a bunch of “sensitive/sad bastard” pop songs.

This album consists of 11 songs, with all but 1 sounding exactly the same. They follow a formula that seems to have been created in a boardroom. The repetitive lyrical content is the singer lamenting that he is sad because his lady is gone or dead or something. Every song seems geared towards 12 year olds trying to show how sensitive they are. The rhyming pattern in the “Wastleand” is so laughable you think the band wrote it in junior high. Generic guitar riffs accompany the words in a way that lure you into a deep sleep only to be woke by Chris Brown’s off-key singing. As the album progresses, the numbers on the CD player slowly tick by much the same way a calendar does to a prisoner. Then out of nowhere comes “Cover Up” the preverbal needle in the crappy haystack. The song breaks rank from its’ ball-less predecessors and shows some anger. Instead of crying over some girl, again, she is getting called out over being two-faced. Wait, is that the lone guitar solo on the album I hear? Yes, it is and you wonder why they did not do more. Sadly, the song seems to be the lone exception to the rule.

There was a period of time that the sensitive man was in vogue. If that guy was every trapped in an iceberg and needed to slowly eased back into modern society. Then Trapt’s collection of whiny, crybaby, pussy songs would make him feel right at home.

Normally I include a bands video with the review, but this band sucks so much that I did not want tp give them that one extra Youtube hit.

MTV fucks up Headbangers Ball, again

2008-10-29T21:17:00.000-07:00

It doesn’t seem possible but MTV did the unthinkable and fucked up Headbangers Ball again.
For the fifth time.
In case you didn’t know, and judging by the dearth of advertising from MTV, this was the 20th Anniversary of Headbangers Ball. The show dedicated solely to hard rock and metal videos was a Saturday Night destination for headbangers everywhere. When the show first started it was the only avenue for these bands to get exposure. When the 80’s Metal boom happened it was an important outlet for new bands plus it allowed heavier bands to get noticed.
Initially, the show was a wasteland for hosts. It seemed like anyone that was in the studio got a shot at hosting. Downtown Julie Brown, Smash (?), Kevin Seale (later a host of 120 Minutes), and most noticeably Adam Curry were all hosting alumni. The lion maned VJ would seem like the perfect host on appearances but he had zero cred with the viewers at home. Then along came Rikki Rachtman, bar owner and personal friend of Axl Rose. He was the perfect host who came across like a normal fan that just happened to be hosting the show. He had tremendous knowledge and enough of a personal relationship with many of the acts allowing them to relax. Everyone remembers the famous episode of Rikki at the water park with Alice in Chains. Also, Rachtman’s birthday shows were memorable because you got to see artist relaxing and eventually smashing cake in his face.
Then Seattle happened.
The grunge phenomenon spelled doom for Headbangers Ball. Anyone with longhair and a properly tuned guitar were shunned for guys in flannel and beanies. Ironically, most of those bands were well received by the Metal community since there were so many similarities. Nirvana was even on the show with Kurt wearing a ball gown. Get it, ball gown. I guess you had to be on heroin to find it funny, Alice in Chains were regulars and that band even went out on tour with Slayer, Megadeth, and Anthrax. The problem arose when MTV decided to play the same videos it was showing during the day and on 120 Minutes during Headbangers Ball.
Mistake number one.
They should have just rolled with the times and played heavier bands like Slayer, Speultura, Mixed in with bands that expanded the genre such as Love/Hate, King’s X and Faith No More. With a two hour show you could do this and still play a new Motley or Poison video. The show always struggled with the many facets of heavy music so why give up now?
Then came one of the darkest days for metal. The newly shorn Rachtman said the next guest was an act whose shirts he regularly sees at Slayer shows. Upon returning from commercial the viewer was greeted with the visage of House of Pain. Are you fucking kidding me?!?!? House of Pain??? If I ever seen a House of Pain shirt at a Slayer show it was being used to wipe up the blood of the guy that unwisely wore it.
That would be “jumping around” mistake number two.
The show was put out of its’ misery shortly after. In truely classy fashion, MTV did not give the fans or Rachtman a chance to say goodbye. Curiously, a new show debuted in its’ time slot called Superock. It was hosted by Julia Valet, a magazine editor and former nanny to the Cobain’s. The show tried to play the heavier side of alternative and metal mixed in with classic videos from the likes of Judas Priest. It flopped horribly and if you can find the infamous video of Julia with Slayer in a diner, it is cringe worthy.
Yes, that would be “superocking” mistake number three.
With the phoenix like rise of metal in the past couple of years, MTV2 brought back Headbangers Ball. This time it was hosted by Jamey Jasta, singer of Hatebreed. While it may be true that he never cracked a smile during his hosting stint, it did re-open the outlet for the genre. The new show was great for exposing the next wave in American Metal, Lamb of God, Shadows Fall, and Mastodon. The one drawback seemed to be that as time went on the playlist seemed to be dominated by metalcore bands, even though the genre had faded away. I guess the payola checks from Victory Records still got to the producers. Then came the downturn,. Jasta went on tour and a new host was never hired. Rumors of metal vixen Juliya of Fuse TV never came to fruition. Instead we got a show that sometimes was one-hour, another times two. One week it would be on at 10 PM , another midnight. One thing for sure is that it always started late. Viewers got the feeling that they were being fucked with, and knowing the snobbery towards Metal, it was probably true.
Mistake numero quatro.
So you can imagine the excitement of the younger me fighting through the almost middle age me, when the DVR said that there was a Best of Headbangers Ball on every night culminating with a 2 hour show on Saturday. More importantly, the Wed show was going to be the Alice in Chains at the water park episode. Hoorah!!
Well hold the party balloons because what we got was the same tired videos mixed in with 20 second interviews on the importance of the Ball hosted by Jose Mangin. Mangin is the host of Sirius radio’s Hard Attack. This guy seems like the biggest dork in the world. He was so over anxious and acted like he has never met a musician before. Then there is the Hot Topic starter kit he calls a wardrobe topped off by a faux-hawk. A faux-hawk are you fucking kidding me?? At least he did not wear his Ed Hardy shirt. Then in true MTV fashion they played the same interview three times in the same episode only to be topped off with a commercial for Subterranean super imposed of Lars Ulrich’s head. BLOW ME MTV!!!!
The topper was the host reunion show on Saturday night. Mr. Mangin was there with Rachtman, Jasta and Dee Snider. The lead singer of Twisted Sister hosted Heavy Metal Mania a show that was the precursor to the Ball. On the show we did see a lot of newer vids from Slipknot, Mastodon mixed in with classics from Ozzy and the like. The former host reunion was incredibly disappointing since the interview segments were limited to only 45 seconds. Mind bogglingly stupid but this is the same channel that has reality shows from uber skanks Tila Tequila and Paris Hilton. The show concluded by all the hosts giving Captain Faux-hawk their endorsement for the supposed new host. MTV managed to screw up 6 hours of a Headbangers Ball retrospective which should have been a slam dunk for a first year TV broadcast major.
A not at all surprised, mistake number five.
So it seems like Hot Topic poster boy Jose Mangin is the new host and the show should last about 6 months. Unless he improves dramatically he will drive viewers away in droves. What the show needs is someone that can bridge the new show with the audience from the old. The ideal hosts would be Mark Strigl and John Ostronomy from the Talking Metal podcasts. They may still be under contract with Fuse and are probably considered too old by the network. The other choice would be the aforementioned Juliya Chemetsky. She hosted Uranium, the Fuse TV version of Headbangers Ball. Her knowledge combined with already having a known presence in the scene would be fantastic. Instead we will be stuck with a guy that will gush over Underoath like he just won the jackpot.
Mistake number six.

Metallica-Death Magnetic CD Review

2008-09-24T19:11:00.000-07:00

Comebacks are a tricky thing. Many people wrongly assume that they happen overnight when in actuality it is a long and arduous trek. While Metallica are still one of the biggest bands on the planet for many diehard fans, they need to start putting one foot in front of the other. Their newest release Death Magnetic is a valiant attempt of righting the wrongs of St. Anger and Load. The band has eschewed longtime producer and confidant Bob Rock and has brought in the legendary Rick Rubin. His arrival is immediately evident as he has corrected the wet cardboard box drum sound heard on their last disc. One other aspect of the Metallica sound that has been absent lo these many years is the return of the long song. There are 10 tracks and only one is under 6 minutes. While this may not seem like a big deal to many, to the diehards that saw Metallica open for Ozzy or play the Monsters of Rock, this is HUGE news.
What this ensures is that there are no more 3 minute attempts at pop stardom by the heaviest band in the land. Back are guitar solos between James Hetfield and Kirk Hammett that last more than 30 seconds. The get to play, play some more, and more after that. They play notes and chords they have not used in such a longtime it must be like running into a long lost friend. Tracks “The End of the Line” and “The Day That Never Comes” have the same feel and emotion that was prevalent back in the day. It is most evident on “Suicide and Redemption” a 10-minute instrumental that deftly explores all the facets of their metal heritage.
Death Magnetic is not a wayback machine though; there is still some of their modern sound on there. “Cyanide” has the familiarity that many new Metallica fans will recognize. Unfortunately something else familiar makes an unwelcome return. For some unknown reason Metallica has broken out their recycling bin and recorded “The Unforgiven III”. The first one was good, the second was bad, and this one is just atrocious. It just smacks of unoriginality and the only thing I can figure is that the band got into Rubin’s secret stash.
As a whole Death Magnetic is a great step for Metallica and their quest to becoming the great band they were and not the media creation they became.

Metal Church-This Present Wasteland CD Review

2008-09-23T20:57:00.001-07:00

Change can be a very overrated thing, while it may be good for technology, fashion or haircuts. It does not have to a necessity in the music industry. Why does a band have to change with the times? Do they not just become a glorified monkey act?

When I put on the new CD from Metal Church, This Present Wasteland, I want old school trash metal. I want tight spandex denim pants with big white puffy hightop sneakers. A jean jacket covered in patches and pins of obscure UK metal bands that only the most informed heshers would know.

I need galloping riffs with soaring vocals about battles or dragons or destruction. Would be too greedy to get all three?

It would be dismissive and insulting to lump Metal Church in with the run of the mill metal bands. After all they do have the classics The Dark, Blessed In Disguise and Hanging In The Balance in their discography. Their storied background should ensure a disc full of metal goodness.

It should.

What is immediately noticeable is how thin the guitars sound. They have taken the key instrument in their genre and have given it a vasectomy. To make matters worse the same sound is prevalent through the whole album. Well at leas t it can be saved by the soaring vocals, right?

Almost. Vocalist Ronny Munroe is a decent singer but for this music you need to be distinctive and he ends up be generic. He does have good power and ability but ends up sounding like a throaty version of Bruce Dickinson.

As disappointing as those two necessities are, the first half of the album is just as bad. Starting off with “Company of Sorrow” with its’ pedestrian riff and an atypical scream that sounded like it was the worst take ever put on tape. Not to be out done “The Perfect Crime” comes next and it has a nonsensically bizarre keyboard line. Of course the song is so recycled sounding that it feels like a left over demo from Tattooed Millionaire.

What is so disappointing about this album is that it could have been better. With new bands like Merciless Death and the triumphant return of Testament, there are legions of metalheads ready for a new Metal Church CD. They can put the puffy Nike hightops away because This Present Wasteland will not be a glorious return to the old school. It feels like a long stay in detention.

Underoath-Lost In The Sound Of Seperation CD Review

2008-09-06T22:18:00.001-07:00

It would be a huge mistake to ignore Underoath because they have been labeled a Christian band. Stryper they are not. What they are is one of the leading metal bands out there and with their newest album. Lost In The Sound of Separation, they will soon be hard to ignore. They have expanded their sound and repertoire by starting to incorporate some Radiohead influence along with their heaviness. The album is like many of the songs, a slow build followed by enormous brutality. On “Emergency Broadcast: The End Is Near” they let add a little atmosphere in and the song takes a different path and breaks out of a cookie cutter design. Underoath does have the dueling vocal styles, thankfully both guys are capable and blend well together especially on “The Only Survivor Was Miraculously Unharmed”. The album title may say Lost but the band has definitely found their way.

Black Stone Cherry-Folklore & Superstition CD Review

2008-09-06T17:28:00.001-07:00

Over the past couple of years many bands been tagged with the Southern rock label. For the most part this is an undeserving however for Black Stone Cherry it is well deserved. Their sound is fully entrenched in the tradition of The Allman Brothers, Lynyrd Skynyrd, and Blackfoot. What Black Stone Cherry does is sprinkle in some modernity and voila, out comes Folklore & Superstition. This is their sophomore release and the band shows tremendous growth. Take a track like “Long Sleeves” its’ guitars are dark and heavy but with singer Chris Robertson’s distinctive drawl it becomes a genre crossing pleasurefest. Album opener “Blind Man” is the first single and a beer swillin’ hard rockin’ good first choice but “Peace is Free” is the real gem. Its’ big sing-a-long chorus hooks you in until you are arm in arm with whomever is next to you and belting one out.

Dragonforce-Ultra Beatdown CD Review

2008-09-03T18:50:00.000-07:00

It can be a tough to describe the sound of Dragonforce to the uninformed. Try and think of the most learned virtuoso and jam him full of energy drinks. Or, what would happen if Guitar Hero was a band instead of a video game. The best one I have run across is, if you took Journey and gave them a handful of uppers. What Ultra Beatdown does is render the listener in slack jawed wonder at the ability for an artist to play as fast and as technical as they do. The wonderment can wear off become even though the album is only 7 songs long, after about the third one you feel as if you have heard it all. It kicks off at 100 mph with the appropriately named “Heroes Of Our Time”, with its’ big choruses, flaring keyboards, and a whirlwind of guitars. It does not let up until “A Flame For Freedom” a surprising mid-tempo number that echoes the AOR of the 80’s.

Slipknot-All hope Is Gone CD Rview

2008-09-03T18:38:00.000-07:00

Who would have thought that a band from Iowa, featuring nine guys in masks and prison jumpsuits would be the flag bearers for American heavy music. All Hope Is Gone is the latest release from Slipknot and the show no signs of slowing down with age. Slipknot has kept skipping menacingly along down the thrash path from their last album. “Psychosocial” is the lead single features a sing along chorus paired with very dark and disturbing lyrics. “Shin Happy People” it is not. Even darker is “Gehenna”, a love song for serial killers with singer Corey Taylor eschewing all pop traces and channeling Hannibal Lecter.
The real gem of the album is “Gematria (The Killing Name)”. It is a violent audio experience that is a just representation of its’ dark subject. There is also a special edition available that has a 35 minute “making of” DVD. Whichever one you buy, you will not be disappointed.

Rock The Bayou 2008 recap

2008-09-03T08:01:00.000-07:00

Well it has been 24 hours, sufficient enough to reflect on the experience that was Rock The Bayou 2008. This was the inaugural event for the Houston version of the highly successful Rocklahoma. A 4-day musical orgy featuring the bands that flooded MTV screens with images of L.A. bands knee deep in spandex and hair spray. While it has been almost two decades since many of these acts had their “glory days” this was no tribute, it was a celebration.
If there is one word that you could use to sum the show it would be honest. All the performaces I saw were bands bent on giving a truly great performance and not merely aping what made them popular way back when. The sincerity was even evident when the out put was horrible. Monday night’s headliner was Poison frontman and skank wrangler/reality show object Bret Michaels. He came out and gave every thing he had. Unfortunately his effort could not mask that his set was that of a basic cover band. Everyone there just wanted to him do Posion songs and be done with it. Sadly, the bandana cowboy decided that he needed to inflict his version of “Sweet Home Alabama” upon us. It was as bland as one could imagine and yet he was all smiles and honestly thought that is was great. Unfortunately that was to be followed by “Your Mama Don’t Dance” and “That’s What I Like About You” complete with the bands smiles. My companion eNeysa noticed that every acoustic song that Bret does sounds like “Every Rose Has A Thorn”. This theory was proven when we heard “Something To Believe In” and by the time he broke out “Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door” It sounded like “Every Door Believes In Heaven”. Yet, the band was having a great time and when you see a band onstage enjoying themselves, you cannot help but enjoy them.
Twisted Sister preceded Bret and they tore up the place. They did the unthinkable and played there big hit right off the bat, breaking out with “We’re Not Going To Take It”. Led by the fitter than he was in 1985 Dee Snider, the band blazed through their 45 minute set punctuated by Snider’s banter. He is the epitome of a great frontman. A dynamic presence with great repertoire and a distinctive voice. He is so funny and engaging that you don’t mind jumping in the air and looking like a jackass. Out of all the weekends acts, Twisted were the only ones to still have all original members. The reason is simple; they still enjoy playing with each other. Although someone needs to tell guitarist JJ French that his stage wig looks ridiculous. I think balding homeless guys would refuse to wear that thing.
We also went on Saturday mainly to see the triumphant return of Lita Ford. Now most people only know her from the ice licking video “Kiss Me Deadly”. But to many teenage boys in the 80’s, she was a VERY important figure. She has not performed live in over a decade, instead opting to start a family and move to some Caribbean island.
Lucky.
She showed no signs of rust and came out wielding a guitar in the shape of a Stoli bottle. Like always, she is the only guitarist in her band and she still rips. They tore through some of her better known songs until something very dreaded happened and I am not taking about her son bringing her some vodka. That was actually kind of cool. What I am talking about is a drum solo followed by a keyboard solo. While the drum solo was predictable, even with stickless drumming, the keyboard solo was mind numbing. What made it even more curious was that the band had come back onstage during it. Apparently the keyboardist was so wrapped up in it that he became oblivious to them. Even Lita remarked “Why don’t you just played the whole album?” She delivered it with a smile that was only matched by the keyboardist’s as he was coming down from his ivory tinkling high. The only drawback to Lita’s set was Rod Ryan’s annoying intro. This douche bag mother fucker was basically verbally jacking off as he it. What was even more puzzling is that this microphone monkey is from Buzz 94.5. This “station’ is called Houston’s New Rock Alternative so naturally you would want one of these Clear Channel hacks at a show spotlighting 80’s bands. What a putz.
Closing out Saturday night was the Red Rocker himself, Sammy Hagar. When the curtain dropped it revealed his backing band the Waboritas with several dozen fans on a stage behind the drummer. Curiously, they all seemed to have the same margarita glass so I guess if you bought one of those $30 margaritas you got to go onstage. There seemed to be no screening process since one lady screamed that she wanted to fuck Sammy when she had the mic. Another, let’s be kind and call her a cougar, a very old cougar albeit, showed the audience her mommy bags. Actually her grandmommy bags to be more accurate. Undaunted Sammy played and danced giving us his everything. His shows are of a great bar band on a very big stage. The lone mishap was his attempted cover of Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love”. It was really hackish and upset eNeysa so much that I had to buy her several SoCo and Diet Coke’s to calm her down.
On one of the side stages we saw Vain. Some may remember their song “Beat the Bullet” but it was only a minor hit. This band had some extraordinaire bad luck. The first album did well and as they were about to release their second, the label went under. They were trapped in record label hell and until Seattle happened. Undaunted they released several excellent albums overseas. Saturday night they played a set like they were kids trying to impress A&R guys on the Sunset Strip.
I am sure that the five bands I mentioned were not the exception. Concert goers were treated to many great performances regardless if the were actually any good. That was what these bands represented, great shows and having fun. Giving a good performance and making sure the audience had a good time is a must. If you didn’t the fans would let you know. All the bands seemed to deliver and making Rock the Bayou a success.
Hopefully the promoters will do this again next year. With some extra time to promote, add in Tesla, Whitesnake, Winger and Sebastian Bach to the bill, pray that there is not hurricane and we can do this allover again.

Finally!!! Kimbo Slice versus Ken Shamrock!! UGH!!!

2008-08-26T16:52:00.002-07:00

It’s not the end of the world, but to many MMA fans it is damn sure close. For some inexplicable reason EXC has announced that the next opponent for Kimbo Slice will be none other than Ken Shamrock. Yes, the same Ken Shamrock that has not one his last 5 fights and his last opponent was Mad Dog Buzz Sawyer. Oops, I mean Buzz Berry. Of course after that fight he may have wanted to a loss to the Mad Dog instead. To add some more perspective that last time that Ken Shamrock won a fight was at UFC 48 with a TKO of Kimo.

Kimo!!!! Are you freaking kidding me?

I know that EXC wants to protect Kimbo but they are now at the point to where they are hurting him. Anyone with a semblance of MMA knowledge knew that the last opponent James Thompson was an imported tomato can with an abnormal growth in place of his ear. However, instead of going done quicker that Tank Abbott, Thompson showed the world how inexperienced Kimbo actually is.

For his next fight he should have been given another tomato can. EXC and CBS both need for him to go out there and look like the inhuman punching machine that they think he is. I am not clamoring for another Bo Cantrell, no one needs to see another guy quit during the ring introductions. I would rather they use Dan Christiansen or Brad Imes. Both of these fighters have a legitimate background and are still close enough to tomato cans than contenders.

To add insult to injury Jared Shaw is going around telling everyone how great this fight is. Saying that Kimbo is the toughest striker in a MMA is beyond laughable I can think of at least 25 more dangerous strikers off the top of my head. Heck, I can think of 5 just in EXC alone and one of them is a woman, Gina Carano.

Unfortunately all of this is falling on deaf ears. Jared Shaw seems as oblivious to MMA and we are going to have this conversation every three to four months when Kimbo fights another undeserving opponent. The real disappointment is that I have become a fan of Kimbo. Not his fighting per say but of Kimbo the person. He earned an academic scholarship to college and after the years of internet fights decided to go legit. Any man that Bas Rutten has taken under his wing is good enough for me.

With the 10/4 show being on CBS it is incredibly important for the company to get a good rating. There thinking is that the casual fan will recognize the Shamrock name and tune in. Add in a Gina Carano fight and EXC should get there wish.

So I guess this makes sense. At least it is not Butterbean.

Alice Cooper-Along Came A Spider CD Review (late)

2008-08-19T19:55:00.000-07:00

On Along Came a Spider, Alice Cooper basically throws mud over his own legacy. To say that this is a bad album would be unfair. This is much more of an example of leeching off your own past and recycling leftover material. What is even worse is how ridiculous Alice comes off. With the somewhat recent success of Marilyn Manson, Alice now seems like he is doing a parody of himself. All of his bravado on “Vengeance Is Mine” is lost when you remember that Alice spends most of the day golfing at private country clubs. When he writes lyrics about being your lover and your killer all it does is elicit snickers. The reality is that Mr, Cooper is over 60 years old so hearing someone your grandfathers’ age sing about using handcuffs on you, is kind of creepy. Ignore this and just enjoy your memories of “I’m Eighteen” untainted.

The Dandy Warhols-…Earth to the Dandy Warhols

2008-08-19T19:50:00.000-07:00

All is well in the land of the Dandy’s. The Dandy Warhols have just released Earth To The Dandy Warhols via their own label, Beat The World Records. Being free from a record label has allowed them to produce an album that they wanted. Diehard fans should not fear, Earth To The Dandy Warhols has its’ fair share of the bands hooky alt-rock songs. Starting off with “The World The People Together” a song that is so bouncy you may need a seat belt. Then the band somehow combines the Talking Heads with The Rolling Stones’ “Emotional Rescue” on “Welcome to the Third World”. Another musical influence shows up on “Talk Radio” which is striking similar to “Pictures of Matchstick Men”. Then the Dandy’s show their punk side with the three chord barrage of “Valerie Yum”. Earth also has a couple of interesting guest appearances. Dire Straits’ Mark Knopler and Heartbreaker Mike Campbell.

CSS-Donkey CDReview (a tad late)

2008-08-19T19:44:00.000-07:00

Many people first heard CSS when their song “Music is My Hot Hot Sex” was featured in an Apple iPod Touch commercial. CSS, Cansei de Der Sexy or tired of being sexy, specialize in creating catchy sometimes retro sounding dance songs with attitude and a wry smile. On their newest release Donkey, all of the same elements are there but it just seems a little off. Fronted by anti-diva vocalist Lovefoxxx, CSS has released a batch of body shakers but without the edge that was included on their debut. While lead single “Left Behind” is laden with robot inducing keyboards, it is devoid of the irony that fans have become accustomed to. In all honesty it is a true pop single. That is not to say that Donkey is a bad album, it is still a good spin. “Beautiful Song” has some of that trademark CSS flair as does “How I Became Paranoid”

August Top 10 Fighters

2008-08-11T20:32:00.000-07:00

Well it was another triumphant UFC pay per view so it is time for a new Top 10 list.

Yea!!!

In the past 30 days we have had a UFC PPV, a UFC Fight Night Live, and the debut show from Affliction. All of those fights mean changes are abound.

One word of clarification, if you saw last week’s episode of MMA Live on ESPN. Former heavyweight champ Frank Mir gave a very detailed definition of what he considers the best pound for pound to be. According to him, the fighters are all the same weight so some their inherent advantages and disadvantages are taken away. He is concentrating on technique and skill. While I certainly take ability into consideration, my view is how dominant one is in his division.

Top Ten Pound For Pounder’s.

Anderson Silva-duh.
George St. Pierre-with his won over Jon Fitch, a definite #2
Urijah Faber-I am amazed every time this guy fights. If he was bigger he would be a household name.
Fedor Emelianenko-he quieted all doubters with his 36 second destruction in Tim Sylvia
BJ Penn-arguably the most talented but his competition is not as good as the others. A win over GSP would make him a #1 consideration.
Forrest Griffin-still riding the victory wave, even though I thought he lost.
Miguel Torres-like Faber if he was bigger he would be a superstar. He does have the worst haircut in MMA. It’s like Eddie Guerrero bad.
Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira-best HW in UFC should stay that way after Mir.
Andre Arlovski-win over Rothwell showed that they old Pitbull is back.
Rampage Jackson-his only loss was the Forrest and I though he won it.

Why others aren’t here:

Randy Couture-last time he fought I had a girlfriend

Kid Yamamoto-ditto

Carlos Condit-while the WEC champ is good his competition is not.

Kimbo Slice-shame on you for even thinking that.

Whitesnake-Good To Be Bad- CD Review

2008-04-23T20:48:00.000-07:00

Yes this is a new Whitesnake CD and no it is not 1986. Good To Be Bad is the triumphant return of David Coverdale and his band of cockrockers. The album starts off with “Best Years” a rather fitting song that is a lyrical and musical statement that Whitesnake is not a nostalgic act. What is readily apparent is that Coverdale’s voice is still strong after all these years. Many of the songs have the heavy blues element that marked early Whitesnake, suiting Coverdale’s voice to a T. That title track is perfect evidence as well as “A Fool In Love”. There is the requisite power ballad with “Summer Rain“, so get your Zippo’s ready. There is a head scratchers in “Lay Down Your Love” that has a familiar sounding intro that seems woefully out of place.
Credit has to be given to guitarists Reb Beach and Doug Aldrich whose playing helps to drive this train. Both give the songs enough flash and style without overpowering the tracks.

The Breeders-Mountains Battles

2008-04-22T20:02:00.000-07:00

After 6 long years, The Breeders have returned with Mountain Battles. Kim Deal and company have cranked out 13 tracks of schizophrenic pop tunes. For anyone longing for the hookiness of “Cannonball“, they will be sorely disappointed. Most of the songs sound unstructured or like leftover ideas. More precisely they sound like a Pixies CD except without the Pixies. Listen to “German Studies” or “Walk It Off” and one will leave waiting for Black Francis’ vocals to kick in. The Breeders come somewhat close with “No Way” just a little bit noisier.
One of the more interesting tracks is “Here No More”, it features a duet with the Deal sisters along with an acoustic country accompaniment. They then take a Spanish turn with “Regalme Esta Noche“. The Breeders must be given credit for trying out different ideas, however Mountains Battles ends up being a collection of good ideas never come to fruition.

Children of Bodom-Blooddrunk CD Review

2008-04-21T22:48:00.000-07:00

Children of Bodom's newest CD, Blooddrunk, should be a declaration that they are among today's metal elite. CoB are ablt to incorporate the sound of yesterday's thrash pioneers with the stylings of today's Metal contemporaries. The thrash-fest gets started with "Hellhounds On My Trail" and does not let up. The usage of keyboards while off-putting to many is an essential element on this album. They way they are used allows the band to retain their heaviness while incorporating a progressive feel.. One of the bands trademarks is their dark sense of humor, it is once again on display with "Lobodomy" and "Tie My Rope". The one glaring problem with the album is Alexi Laiho's vocals. He has not grown as a vocalist and has retained a very generic growl. There is not the feel or a contrast Lamb of God or Trivium have mastered. While Blooddunk is a good album it is not a defining moment.

Raconteurs-Consolers of the Lonely CD Review

2008-03-29T18:22:00.000-07:00

The stopgap between White Stripes albums’ has returned. Jack White’s side project, otherwise known as The Raconteurs, have just released Consolers of the Lonely. While the Raconteurs are more of a band than the Stripes, it still come across as Jack White domination. He does all the vocals and his distinctive guitar sound is ever present. Most of the songs sound like they are right of the White Stripes vault. “Salute Your Salvation” sounds just like the Stripes just with a competent drummer. However, when the band does do something different, they shine. “You don’t Understand Me“ has to be one of the most beautiful songs of the year. The tinkling ivories and emotional lyrics are musical bliss. “Many Shades of Black” has them incorporating horns and taking on a big band feel. Acoustics, pianos, and a hipster Black Crowes sound emerges on “Pull This Blanket Off”.
Consolers of the Lonely has 14 tracks on it and it is about 2 or 3 songs too much. It is also a good way to satisfy Stripes fans until their next CD comes out.

Awesome Color-Electic Aborigines CD Review

2008-03-21T20:25:00.001-07:00

Brooklyn’s Awesome Color come with a truckload of indie cred. Their record label is owned by Thurston Moore from Sonic Youth If that is not enough then there are the constant comparisons to the Stooges. While may be a slight sonic resemblance, the fact that both acts are from Michigan is a more concrete comparison. Most of the songs on Electric Aborigines are steeped in 70’s electric psychedelic, not the proto-puink stylings of Iggy. Some of the best tracks are those that buck that definition. “Come and Dance” with its’ odd riffs an electric organ standouts from the rest. Country stylings make an appearance on closer “Evil Rose”. One word of warning, the lyrics are bad. Like your first band in junior high bad.
If you like Wolfmother or The Sword, the fuzzy throwback sounds of Awesome Color will take away the grays.

Brian Jonestown Massace-My Bloody Underground CD Review

2008-03-21T20:22:00.000-07:00

Potential. If there ever was a poster boy for potential in music it is Anton Newcombe and the Brian Jonestown Massacre. Anyone that has seen the unforgettable documentary Dig! can attest to this. The band is back with My Bloody Underground and once again shows why they are so irresistible. The music is easily engaging but still has many, many layers enjoy. On “Dropping Bombs” and “Who F*cking Pissed In My Well” you can see that while it maybe cliché and a little unfair to make comparisons to The Beatles and The Byrds, they are the best reference. At times. Then apparently a mood change hits and they become noise gods on “Automatic (expletive) For The People” and “Black Hole Symphony”. Through it all the band is always interesting and highly entertaining, if not frustrating. On My Bloody Underground, BJM show why they are the hot chick with bad teeth. So close, so very close.

Black Keys-Attack & Release CD Review

2008-03-21T20:19:00.000-07:00

When most people think of a two-man blues based band their initial thought is White Stripes. Akron’s Black Keys is the band that is often overlooked. Attack & Release is their new album and should serve notice. While the title carries a forceful name most of the music is fuzzy electric blues. With only two guys in the band Dan Auerbach has created a bottom heavy distorted guitar sound that sounds like 1973. His tone on “Same Old Thing” is so thick you could not cut it with a chainsaw. The band really shines when they just let if fly. “ I Got Mine” and “Strange Times” are perfect examples of how they have taken a garage band and made it and full-on powerhouse.
They do slow it down a couple times and it is a crapshoot. Album closer “Things Ain’t Like They Used To Be” is a definite keeper and many will play this after a breakup, probably crying.

Sheryl Crow - Detours CD Review

2008-03-03T21:08:00.001-08:00

To say that Sheryl has had a bad year or two would be an understatement. First she breaks up with longtime boyfriend Lance Armstrong and then she is diagnosed with breast cancer. Normally that would be the recipe for making her new album Detours the most melancholy album this side of an emo fest. Fortunately for all, she stays far away from the wallowing waters and turns her frown upside down. “Motivation” and “Love Is Free” are so full of sunshine that sunglasses should be required. She breaks out the acoustic for “God Bless This Mess” for a more somber yet uplifting track.
There are a coupe of drawbacks with the album. Even tough returning producer Bill Bottrell has done a great job on the sound he should have done a better job in editing. There are 17 songs here and it should have been about 10. Detours does a good job of putting Sheryl Crow back on the path to success.

Willie Nelson-Moment of Forever-CD Review

2008-02-27T22:01:00.000-08:00

Willie Nelson returns with Moment of Forever, 14 tracks that remind us why the red-headed stranger is so beloved. The title track is a Kris Kristofferson song and Willie pays great homage to his fellow Highwayman. The songs feel, ties perfectly in with "I'm Alive" and its' theme of appreciating the simplest things. Classic country is represented on "Keep Me From Blowing Away" and it is counterbalanced with "Worry B Gone". The former is a duet with Kenny Chesney whom pays homage to one of his idols.
One of the more interesting tracks is Willie's version of "Gravedigger' by the Dave Matthews Band. His voice brilliantly fit's the dark lyrical content and gives the song an added creepiness. Scary in a bad way is the cover of Dylan's "Gotta Serve Somebody". It sounds like something from a neighborhood open mic night.
While Moment of Forever is by no means great, it serves an example of why Willie remains so beloved.
Gravedigger Video.

Gutter Twins-Saturnalia CD Reviw

2008-02-20T20:30:00.000-08:00

If you ever wondered what an audial manifestation of an uber-indie rockers wet dream was, just listen to Gutter Twins. The band is the offspring of Greg Dulli (Afghan Whigs) and Mark Lanegan (Screaming Trees). All of the songs on Saturnalia are the perfect crossbreeding of the two. The pair has teamed up previously on Dulli's Twilight Singers project but this feels like the more collaborative effort. "Circle The Fringes" is a perfect representation of the album. Starting with Dulli's vocals and a strangely snaky sound that is only interrupted by bursts of power chords and then Lanegan's trademark Tom Waits on downers vocals, helps get the album started.. The vocal roles get reversed on "The Stations" with Lanegan now upfront along with his ever present lyrics of depression and sorrow. One of the few upbeat tracks is "Idle Hands" . Musicwise it sounds like the Whigs but the dueling vocals make it a Gutter Twins song. Saturnalia is the perfect album to remind you why one is fan of their other bands .

Airbourne-Running Wild CD Review

2008-01-18T20:30:00.000-08:00

In Back to the Future, the time machine was an old DeLorean. To go back to the 80's you don't need a car you just need Running Wild from Airbourne. This debut from a band of Aussies is so steeped in AC/DC cliches that it borders on theft. Every song, and I do mean every song, is a mid-tempo rocker with a big sing-along chorus. There are no catchy or unique riffs just very pedestrian fair. Rather fitting because the accompanying solos sound like leftovers from an Angus Young practice session. The vocals have the raspy quality ala Brian Johnson but without any of the nuance or enjoyment. The are delivered so half-heartedly they sound like they are being read off a teleprompter. Unfortunately the lyrics are about as "original" as the vocals and music. What Airbourne's debut CD reminds you that for every great artist like an AC/DC there are tons of 3rd rate knockoffs. Airbourne sounds like one of those tribute bands that play at a sportsbar every weekend. Except you don't get any hotwings and there are no girls to serve you food while pretending to flirt with you.

Black Mountain-In The Future CD Review

2008-01-16T20:51:00.000-08:00

For those schizophrenics that are huge music lovers, Black Mountain’s new album is for you. In The Future makes more style jumps than an college radio station. This Canadian 5-piece is harvesting the 70’s sound and giving it a unique twist. The album starts strangely with “Night Walk”. It is sometime lead singer Amy Webber and a keyboard and it is about as entertaining as this sentence. Things take a marked improvement with “Stormy High” and its’ Arcade Fire if they had listened to High of Fire sound. Then there is the acoustic “Stay Free” where the band suddenly morphs into the Thorns. If that wasn’t a drastic enough turn, “Queens Will Play” comes on and now they have become Kate Bush It ends with the 16-minute “Bright Lights” with more fuzz and distortion than a warehouse full of blown speakers. In The Future is an album that will take several listens to fully appreciate. However if you give it time it will be well worth it.

Ayreon-01011001 CD Review

2008-01-13T19:39:00.000-08:00

Ayreon is a one-man group project led Arjen Lucassen. On his new album 01011001, he once again corrals a who' who list of musicians and vocalists and weaves them into a storyline that makes absolutely no sense. 01011001 is the story of Planet Y, 01011001 is its' binary code clever huh, and its' struggle in an age of technology. Trippiness like this is usually reserved for Pink Floyd or Voivod The music is progressive rock in nature and the mood will go from laidback space age to full on rock in a minute. "Liquid Etiernity" does this several times. What Arjen does so well is take the different singers and crafts songs for them suiting their strengths. "Connect The Dots" with Ty Tabor from King's X is a prime example. 01011001 is not an album that you will play a single from. It is like The Wall or Operation Mindcrime, where you will sit down and listen to the whole thing. It is a double album so you definately get your money's worth. You can up that value with the special edition that includes a DVD as well.

Monster Magnet-4 Way Diablo CD Review (late)

2008-01-01T21:33:00.000-08:00

Describing Monster Magnet can be a difficult task. I have found that the best description is, psychedelic stripper music sung by a cult leader. On their newest CD, 4-Way Diablo, they have earned such a grandiose label. The band is led by songwriter/singer/guitarist Dave Wyndorf and he does he best to earn the cult leader moniker. His lyrics are peppered with phrases that make no sense but sound like the words of a philosopher. Granted, the philosopher is an egomaniac that has been tripping on mescaline but still. The first lines from “Wall of Fire” are proof with “ Well I’m back/I’ve got a cock made out of platinum”. Physics aside, this is just one example of a grandiose that makes even the most crotch grabbin’, bling sportin’ rapper look like a folk singer. If that is not enough, “No Vacation” has the soon to be classic lines “I got religion on the Love Boat/You rode a horsey down in Spain/Go get another bag of pommes frites/I’m busy cleaning out the stains”. That should elicit a “what the fuck” from you, if not then you’ve already joined Wyndorf’s cult. While the words on “No Vacation” are strange, the music with its’ unrelenting drumbeat and fuzzy guitars are undoubtedly great. All of the songs on 4-Way Diablo have a snaky rhythm that is more pole grinding than head banging. The exception is album, closer “Little Bag of Gloom”, which is the greatest break-up song/funeral dirge that you will ever hear. The emotion of the lyrics are reinforced by the electric organ accompaniment and gives it and extra level of moroseness.
4-Way Diablo is the perfect storm of weirdness and greatness that everyone should hear.
http://www.myspace.com/monstermagnet

The reason for the gap

2007-12-31T20:22:00.000-08:00

There is a perfectly good explanation to why there is a near 6-month gap in between postings. I decided to just post on my Myspace page. However, after visiting a couple of other colleagues blogs, I figured having this would help. Hell looking at my page views it sure could not hurt. So tell your friends and if you hate me tell two of your enemies.

Prince-Planet Earth CD Review

2007-08-08T13:54:00.000-07:00

It is a little uneasy that the main hoopla surrounding Prince’s new album Planet Earth, is not that it is good or bad but that was available for free with a British tabloid. While giving away his album may have angered some retailers, it was a terrific idea since it gave some former fans a chance to get re-acquainted without any risk. The purple one has been producing a steady stream of substandard releases that have from the moniker of living genius to that of a Paul McCartney. What Planet Earth does successfully is showcase Prince’s wide-ranging abilities. “Guitar” is the song that you hear in a cell phone commercial and some of his best fret playing since the unreleased Undertaker Sessions. The influences of old school R&B ballads are echoed on “Somewhere Here On Earth” with its’ entrancing smoothness that will ensure that many people will be “having relations” while listening to it. He then quickly changes to his pop formula with “The One U Wanna C“. He does get a little goofy with “Chelsea Rodgers” a nice funk number that has some Bible stories in it.

The Simpsons Soundtrack-CD Review

2007-08-01T18:09:00.000-07:00

Normally the idea of reviewing The Simpsons Soundtrack CD would be cause for rejoicing. It would mean that The Simpsons movie on the way and who would not love that. Unfortunately all joy must be tempered because this soundtrack sucks worse than Ned Flanders halftime show. For some unknown reason the powers that be decided to not use Alf Clausen, who has been scoring for the TV show for nearly two decades, and decided to use Hanz Zimmer instead. Now Mr. Zimmer may be an award winning composer for Gladiator and The Pirates movies but he is as out of place as Disco Stu at a Slayer concert. It is a shame because with titles like “Thank You Boob Lady” and “His Big Fat Butt Could Shield Us All” this should be a fun CD. What it is, is bland and pedestrian background music that sounds like it could come from a myriad of films. They made the mistake of making this a serious release instead of copying the formula of Songs in the Key of Springfield and intermixing dialogue with songs. To paraphrase Comic Book Guy “Worst Soundtrack Ever!”

Yeah Yeah Yeahs-The Is Is EP CD Review

2007-07-31T23:08:00.001-07:00

I love the idea of EP’s. First and foremost they are cheaper, this one will run you about $6. Second, it prevents the label from re-releasing a previous album and slapping these tracks on and making me buy something a second time. Lastly, I would rather a band give me 5 or 6 quality tracks instead of a sub par long play release. Yeah Yeah Yeahs have done this with their foray into the EP marketplace with The Is Is. All five tracks are new studio songs that have been previously heard on their live DVD. It is evident that they have been road tested as they have a recognizable live feel to them. On opening track
“Rockers To Shallow”, the craziness and sweaty anger comes through loud and clear. While it may be unofficial, the band pays a sonic debt to the Pixies with “Kiss Kiss”. The remaining songs sound like vintage Yeahs and leaves the listener with a great feeling and with a couple extra bucks in their pocket.

The Chemical Brothers-We Are The Night CD Review

2007-07-31T23:06:00.000-07:00

The Chemical Brothers return with a new collection of eclectic electronica songs. After listening to We Are The Night, on will see that the keyword in last sentence is eclectic. The Chems do a fascinating job of mixing and mashing different styles depending on the song. They can go from a throwback Human League sound on “All Rights Reserved” to “Battle Scars” which sounds like Iggy Pop if he would have joined New Order. One of the true standout tracks “Saturate” with its’ minimalist trance keyboards that give way to a big rock chorus. Also, “The Pills Won’t Help You Now”, besides having a truly great title, has Tim Smith of Midlake doing vocals on a track that sounds like music for the new Barbarella movie, and that is actually a compliment. It would be remiss to review this album without mentioning “The Salmon Dance”. This track features guest vocalist Fatlip and the result is a song that is one part novelty and another part “Whomp There It Is!”. While it may be lyrically this side of Sesame Street, it is incredibly catchy and after listening to the whole album, may be the one song you will remember most. Not sure if that is a good or a bad thing.

Nile-Ithyphallic CD Review

2007-07-22T23:33:00.001-07:00

According to the dictionary, Ithyphallic refers to the phallus carried in festivals of Bacchus. It also describes the huge erections displayed on statues of the gods. So what do huge boners have to do with the new CD from Nile? You got me.
It does see like an odd title for an extreme metal band, but Nile are a tad obsessed with Egypt. Ithyphallic is the band's fifth full length release but it pales in comparison to previous efforts. The band is comprised of some of the best players in the genre, that is why it's so puzzling that they seem out of sync with one another at times. The uniqueness of what got the band to where they are is seemingly gone. "What May Safely Be Written", is one of the few tracks that captures the Egyptian influence and injects it with some good ole fashioned American metal. The rest of the songs come across rather formulaic and boring. When Nile first broke they were a breath of fresh air. With Ithyphallic they are as stale as the insides of a sarcophagus.

Crowded House-Time On Earth CD Review

2007-07-18T19:37:00.000-07:00

Australia’s Crowded House is jumping on the revival bandwagon with a summer tour and of course a new CD. Time On Earth is the first in over a decade but picks up where the band left off. Sadly, there is one member missing, drummer Paul Hester committed suicide in 2005. Neil Finn’s songwriting has always had a somberness to it, but tracks “Nobody Wants To” and “Pour Le Moude” are drenched in emotion that feels like therapeutic release. What is shocking is that as renowned of a songwriter that Finn is, there are two tracks with famous co-writers. “Even A Child” is from the pen of ex-Smiths Johnny Marr and one of the peppier songs. That makes somewhat sense but getting all three members of the Dixie Chicks to co-write “Silent House” seems a tad odd. After listening to it, one realizes that it would have been better if the Chicks had sung it. Time On Earth gives you your money’s worth with 14 songs sounding like the band never left but without sounding dated.

Smashing Pumpkins-Zetgeist CD Review

2007-07-09T11:55:00.000-07:00

Billy Corgan has decided to reanimate Smashing Pumpkins and his new version has just released Zeitgeist , for better or for worse. Unfortunately Corgan has pulled an Axel Rose and only original drummer Jimmy Chamberlin is left. Absent members aside, this is no Chinese Democracy. The fact that this is not a reunion album works because Zeitgeist is a more focused, stream lined and straight ahead album; eschewing all traces of their electronica past. Album opener “Doomsday Clock” is one of a number of rockers that sound as if they came from their debut release over decade ago. “United States” is a nine-minute opus that is so soaked in fuzz that it should be on an 8-track.. Corgan even manages to sneak in a love song. “That’s The Way (My Love Is)” is so exceptional, that even the hipsters at the coffee shop will approve. Zeitgeist will ease the minds of many fans that worry that this is just a cash grab, this time you get your moneys worth.

King Diamond-Give Me Your Soul...Please CD Review

2007-07-09T11:53:00.000-07:00

If you ever wanted what a b-grade horror movie would sound like if it was a metal album, then go buy the new one from King Diamond. Give Me Your Soul…Please follows the formula that King Diamond has set out since leaving Mercyful Fate decades ago. This time the story dwells on several mini-murder mysteries including some of his personal after-life experiences. What is immediately noticeable is that King Diamond’s trademark higher than the Bee Gee’s falsetto is gone. Time has apparently caught up with King and his vocal style now consists of more mid-range while double tracking with some falsetto. While his voice may have changed, his musical cohort guitarist Andy Larocque is still there. Larocque has done a nice job in writing music to fit the storylines. At times though, the riffs do sound at tad familiar but with King Diamond you know what you are getting in the first place.

Bad Brains-Build A Nation CD Review

2007-07-09T11:52:00.000-07:00

Legendary rasta hardcore icons Bad Brains have resurfaced with their new album Build A Nation. The band stays true to form with a nice mixture of hardcore punks songs followed up some extremely mellow reggae. The punkier tracks are very pedestrian with the guitar sounding thinner than Nicole Ritchie. While musically the intent is there, singer HR’s vocals are so laid back it seems like he is singing the wrong song. “In The Beginning” is one of the few songs where it all seems to meld. Nation only really works when the band sticks to a reggae style. Maybe it just lends itself better to their psuedo-religious lyrical themes “Peace Be Unto Thee“ for example. HR’s vocals sound in sync and the band as a whole seem in tune with one another, especially on “Roll One”. Production is handled by longtime fan Adam Yauch of the Beastie Boys, who does a nice job with creating atmosphere on the slower tracks.

Chris Cornell-Carry On CD Review

2007-06-11T09:22:00.000-07:00

Anyone going in expecting the new solo CD from Chris Cornell to harkens back to his glory days will be disappointed. While Carry On may be more pop than punk, do not be misled into thinking that this is some attempt at commerciality. The songs come across like the an ode to Elvis Costello and Paul Westerberg. The music varies from the blues-tinged “Safe and Sound”, the country inspired “Finally Forever” and his bread and butter alt-rock “Poison Eye”. One track that needs to be mentioned is his rendition of Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean”. Cornell does such a great job of remaking the song that it is not recognizable right away. He has turned an 80’s classic dance song in to slow emotional torch song.

Big & Rich-Between Raising Hell and Amazing Grace CD Review

2007-06-11T09:21:00.000-07:00

Big & Rich’s Between Raising Hell and Amazing Grace should show that they were not just a one trick pony. Unfortunately the ballad laden album shows that they forgot what got them to the dance. The first half features slow, traditional country songs highlighted by “Lost on the Moment”. This is a wonderfully honest emotional song about a wedding that one should hear now before they get sick of listening to it at every wedding they attend over the next couple of years. The second half should feature the raucous roadhouse tracks but falls flat. None of these tracks have the swagger of “Save A Horse”. “Please Man” should be that track but the stunt casting of Wyclef drags the song down. The real head scratcher is the lifeless cover of “You Shook Me All Night Long”. Outside of a couple of other gems, most notably “You Never Stop Loving Somebody”, the album as a whole is a disappointment.

Dream Theater-Systematic Chaos CD Review

2007-06-09T21:09:00.000-07:00

Moving to Roadrunner Records seems to be the smartest move that Dream Theater could have done. Systematic Chaos is arguably their best release in over a decade. The band has done a superb job in stripping away the excessive noodling in their songs that turned off many a fan. Dream Theater seems to have channeled the heaviness from their label mates and display a more focused and aggressive attitude. Both “Constant Nation” and “The Dark Eternal Night” are more moshpit inducing than anything they have done before. There is still plenty of virtuostic performances on display to satisfy the most hardcore of fans. The last two songs alone are 15 minutes a piece. There is a 2-disc version available with the second disc having a 5.1 mix of the album

Marilyn Manson-Eat Me Drink Me Cd Review

2007-06-09T21:08:00.001-07:00

It is fitting that in the same week Marilyn Manson’s Eat Me Drink Me is released that Paris Hilton goes to jail. While the slutty heiress is known as a media creation for some reason Manson has been thought of as a legit musical act. Outside of a decent cover song, he has yet to record a memorable song. This new CD is further proof that Manson’s cleverness ends once he enters the recording studio. His ego has driven away talented collaborators Twiggy Ramirez and John 5 and replaced them with Tim Skold.
Whose Tim Skold you ask? Exactly.
The album opens with 2 minutes of a psuedo-instrumental that reeks of ego. Quickly followed by “Heart Shaped Glasses” that sounds like it was lifted from a John Hughes movie. “Red Carpet Grave” has his supposed deeply clever lyrics along with the worst guitar solo outside of a beginners class. If Manson would spend half as much time in developing songs instead of clever song title’s, “They Say Hell’s Not Hot” and “Just a Car Crash Away”, then maybe he would have something worth listening to.

Megadeth-Ubited Abominations CD Review

2007-06-05T08:24:00.000-07:00

It is tough to review the new Megadeth CD, United Abominations, without mentioning leadman Dave Mustaine’s personality. He has gone from one of reverence to incredibly polarizing if not annoying personality. Much of that can be traced to him becoming born again along with his Republican leanings. Then there is the string of bad albums and the fact that he will no longer play any shows that have a Satanic band as well. However, no matter how big of a douche Mustaine has become, and he is a big one, to overlook this CD would be a huge disservice. Album opener “Sleepwalker” features the trademark ‘Deth riffing that echoes of “Hangar 18”. Mustaine’s guitar playing along with Glen Dover’s, show why Megadeth has been the blueprint for thrash playing the past 20 years.
Cristina Scabbia from Lacuna Coil lends her vocal talents on an unremarkable remake of “A Tout Le Monde”. Mustaine’s vocals do not have his signature snarl and do a disservice to the emotion and power of his lyrics. With all things being said, United Abominations is a monster of an album that shows why Megadeth has become a legendary band.

Gretchen Wilson-One of the Boys CD Review

2007-06-05T08:22:00.000-07:00

The redneck woman Gretchen Wilson, returns with her third album One Of The Boys. While the title does seem to indicate that this will be another romp of white trash and outlaw country. What it is, is a CD of very uninspired songs that sound more like Shania Twain than Tanya Tucker. Lyrically, the title track furthers her image of a rough and tumble girl but the music is so blah that it comes across as someone doing a pale imitation of Gretchen. “There is a Place in the Whiskey” and “If You Want A Mother” are two tracks that are right in the wheel house of Gretchen. They have smart, funny and true lyrics that fit perfectly with the upbeat music.
The album closes with “Come To Bed”, a great duet with John Rich. Gretchen and her musical spouse have that special chemistry that like George Jones and Tammy Wynette and Johnny Cash and June Carter had. In the liner notes Gretchen says that this is her most important album she has ever done because it reflects what she has gone through the past couple of years. Just like life when One of The Boys is good, it is good and when it is bad, it is bad.

The Horrors-Strange House CD Review

2007-05-16T11:38:00.000-07:00

There are several things that are noticeable upon listening to Strange House by The Horrors. First is how come no one has already used this name for a band? Especially with al the metal bands out there and then the legions of mall kids that wanted to be Marilyn Manson: you have figured that The Horrors was taken. Second, is how aptly named this album is. Not since Metallica’s Load has a title fit so perfectly. The Horrors are from London, that should be a given since they are the only ones with bands STILL using the “The”. Also, a band as quirky as this could only come from there or a major city on the coast. No way could a band that sounds like the soundtrack from Repo Man with a keyboard could originate from middle America. That is either a shame or it could mean that only the nose in the air music snobs would think this is great. Case in point, The Strokes.
Describing the bands music is sort of a tough proposal. The allusion to the Repo Man soundtrack, more specifically the Circle Jerks, added with a way too upfront keyboard is pretty damn close. Case in point, listen to “Draw Japan” or “Thunder Claps” The later evokes the chanting chorus of “TV Party”. A more conscious comparison is local weirdo’s Attic Ted, if they were in their late teens and wore way too tight jeans.
All of these wacky comparisons may seem like The Horrors have made a bad album and that would not be totally true. Strange House, is good but it gets very repetitive and by the end boring. It would have been nice of the band had done a little more experimenting. There is an instrumental, ”Gil Sleeping”, but it is as interesting as its’ title.
I have a gut feeling that all of the reviewers and writers that have lauded the band with accolades are going to be the only ones who enjoy thus album.

RUSH-Snakes & Arrows CD Review

2007-05-08T18:01:00.000-07:00

I always associate Rush with a high school substitute teacher. In her efforts to relate, she would go on about Neil Peart’s lyrics and whatnot. That unfortunate association has tainted my opinion of the Canadian legends, regardless of classic albums Fly By Night, 2112, and Exit Stage Left. Much like those albums, Snakes & Arrows is another notch in the belt of these prog-rock legends. It has all the hallmarks of a classic Rush album. Forefront is Geddy Lee’s vocals, amazingly sounding as good as they did in 1982. Then there is guitarist Alex Lifeson’s acoustic intro’s and Neil Peart’s lyrics that appeal to music loving English majors. “Faithless” is another insta-classic, showcasing Peart’s “your different but cool” lyrics.
Words are not the only thing and that is evident but the instrumentals on the album. “The Main Money Business” has a world music tinge to it. While “Hope” showcases Lifeson’s acoustic playing. While many bands this far into their career are content to go through the motion, Snakes & Arrows shows that Rush are still hard working men..

Tori Amos-American Doll Posse CD Review

2007-05-08T18:00:00.001-07:00

On her new album American Doll Posse, Tori Amos retunes to he experimental ways with a 20-track concept album. She adapts one of 5 different personalities on each track. This uniquely allows her to go from heart felt piano ballads, “Father’s Son” to full on rockers, “Teenage Hustling”. Lyrically she has different takes on politics on “ Yo George”, and the war “Dark Side of the Sun”. However, her favorite subject matter is men, both bad and real bad men. What is interesting about Tori is how she can write a incredibly empathetic song about abuse, “Big Wheel”, and counter that with “You Can Bring Your Dog”. A lovely little ode to the appeal of bad boys. It is that dichotomy that has garnered Tori so much acclaim.
With so many exemplary songs, the one disappointment is the packaging.. Inside there are pictures of all of Tori’s different personas. While the fact that one resembles Ashlee Simpson is distressing enough, the real tragedy is that the lyric sheet is now microscopic. The lyrics to all 20 songs have been crammed onto one panel

Shadows Fall-Threads of Lilfe CD Review

2007-04-20T18:41:00.000-07:00

In the 80’s their was the big 4 of American metal; Metallica, Megadeth, Slayer, and Anthrax. With the reawakening of the genre there are new flag bearers and all have been scooped up by the major labels. Mastodon and Lamb of God have already made majors debut and both with some amount of critical and financial success. The third head of this Ghidorah of metal is Shadows Fall who have just unleashed Threads of Life. Much like their American cohorts, Shadows Fall does do a good job of retaining their sound without having to sell-out to “the Man“. Threads comes out guns blazing with “Redemption” and “Burning The Lives”, both showcasing Shadows Fall updating of old-school thrash. However, after four or five tracks it starts to sound like you have heard this song before. There is some outstanding guitar playing on this album and it helps to rescue some of the pedestrian tunes. “Another Hero Lost” may sound like a stab for radio play but it is a tribute to the cousin of singer Brian Fair who was killed in action in Iraq. With that backstory no fan should criticize its’ inclusion.
Several years ago everyone thought that Shadows Fall was the band to lead the new wave of metal. While Threads of Life is a good album , when you compare it to some of the other releases it does not stand out like you though it would.

Ric Flair and the Four Horsemen DVD Review

2007-04-11T21:23:00.000-07:00

The newest DVD release from the WWE, Ric Flair and the Four Horseman, recounts the rise, peak ,and fall of one of the greatest wrestling stables of all-time. Of the original four, Ric, Tully and Arn give lengthy interviews along with their manager J.J. Dillon. Only Ole Anderson is absent.

Instead of writing a recap of the DVD, especially since most fans already know the history of the group, let’s just focus on the main points. The main focus of the disc is the original group, even though the one shown on the cover is with Barry Windham. They go through all the lineup changes, why they were made as well as why their replacements were named. One thing that is noticeable from the start is that Arn does his interviews in character the whole time.

I cannot begin to tell you how annoying this is.

They talk about Ole leaving and the arrival of Lex Luger. They are a little rough on Lex but mainly focus on the fact that he was so green. In the extras there is a great story by Barry Windham on how rough the Total Package was. Next member is Barry Windham who turns on Lex to join the group. They only show a clip of that turn. The angle where Barry turns and Dusty as the Midnight Rider chases him down to the heel locker room and getting unmasked, was off the charts.(p>
If this was a Behind The Music special this would be act 3. We have Arn, Tully, and J.J. jumping to the WWF along with their reasons for doing it. This is when the group was just flapping in the wind. We had Kendall Windham, Hiro Matusda, and Sid Vicious in some form or another. This is one of the parts where Arn’s commentary is so annoying. Let’s not forget when Sting joined the group before they turned on him.

Now the darkest day in WCW, Ric Flair leaves for the WWF. His comments on Jim Herd are priceless and you can see the ill will in Ric’s face as he is talking. Fortunately Flair comes back to WCW, unfortunately so does Paul Roma and later a returning Sid to the Horsemen. Roma gives some “interesting” thoughts on the Horsemen gimmick and Flair. They talk about the Sid-Arn incident and Flair gives a real emotional speech on Sid. This was the another low point for the group until their rebirth with Brian Pillman, plus eventually Chris Benoit and Steve “Mongo“ McMichael. They touch on Arn’s retiring and Bischoff gives a surprising statement about he should have let Arn have his moment. The other shocker from Bischoff is him burying Jeff Jarrett. Funny when you consider who much money he spent on signing him, twice. We finish with the version that included Malenko and then end of the group. Everyone finishes on how much the Horsemen meant to the business and their influence.

The extras have some nice interviews and they do show Flair’s return on Nitro in Charlotte. With the matches there is the War Games from 1988 but there are no commentators. Also included is the great vignette when they attacked Dusty in a parking lot and broke his arm. Not to mention the infamous Horsemen vitamins commercials.

Some of the other matches are a tad puzzling. They left off the Clash of the Champions against Sawyer and Muta after they kicked Sting out. Also, when Flair turns on Sting again to reform with Arn and Pillman. Or the War Games match where Henning joined the NWO. I guess they wanted to include a squash against Pez Whatley and Rocky King instead.

What is noticeable is that this set does not have the “insider” fell to it that other have had while that is not necessarily a bad thing, one should be prepared. Overall, they did a good job on the set, while it is not on the same level as the Flair set I found it more entertaining than the Rhodes DVD. Plus if you enjoy it half as much as Flair did talking about it you more than got your money’s worth.

Matt Sera and his aftermath.

2007-04-09T22:36:00.000-07:00

Matt Sera is one cool customer.
It was evident backstage at the weigh-on of Friday. He stood around relaxed signing autographs and taking pictures. He had the same look about him as he entered the octagon Saturday night for his challenge for the welterweight title against Georges St. Pierre at UFC 69 in the Toyota Center in Houston.
He was an 11 to 1 underdog and yet he was still so relaxed. As he entered the cage, he bounced around like it was just another fight.
It was believed that he would have to use his black belt in jiu-jitsu to overpower GSP and take the fight to the ground. Matt gad none of that and after 3 minutes in round 1, he landed a right to GSP that staggered the champ. As he tried to regain his balance, Sera quickly followed that up with another shot that put St. Pierre on the ground where Sera climbed on top and finished the fight with several shots to the champ’s head. Referee Big John McCarthy stopped the since St. Pierre was unable to defend himself.
In only 3 minutes and 25 seconds, Matt Sera went from chump to champ.
“I think there is some humble pie in the back for you.”, Sera told Joe Rogan as he was being interviewed in the ring after the landmark victory.
The months of pre-match boxing training had paid of and paid off big for Sera. His boxing coach Ray Longo credits the extra two months of training that they received when St. Pierre had to postpone form the originally scheduled February date due to injury.
“For once, we weren't working around his jiu-jitsu, and he started to believe in his hands” Longo said as he has been training Sera for over a decade.
The other main fight on the card saw Diego Sanchez and Josh Koscheck square off in a battle of welterweights. Both had been roommates on the first season of the Ultimate Fighter reality series, but the friendship had turned sour. Sanchez started a shoving match at the weigh-in but Koscheck got the last laugh Saturday night. Koscheck’s vastly improved standup skills kept the undefeated Sanchez off balance the whole night. The same ferocity that Sanchez had shown in previous fights was none resistant and the Houston crowd let him know their disappointment with their showering of boos.
The two victories upset the welterweight title picture. Originally, St. Pierre would have faced Sanchez or Matt Hughes with Koscheck going against another contender. Sera would more than like make another PPV or two and then fade away. Now Sera will face Hughes, something they both want. Hughes thinks Sera is a pushover and Sera legitimately hates Hughes.
Whoever his opponent is Sera will be in a new position, he will be the champion.

UFC 69-Shootout Weigh-in Report

2007-04-06T15:10:00.000-07:00

The weigh-in for UFC 69: Shootout was held across the street from the Toyota Center, where the PPV will be held, at Root Memorial Court. This was an outdoor venue and in the Texas heat maybe not the best of ideas. There was an impressive turnout for the event , especially when you consider that this was a traveling holiday. No official count but I had it over 1,000 probably more.
Thankfully everyone made weight this time.
Josh Haynes -171 Luke Cummo-170- Luke had on some impressive Star Wars undergarments
Marcus Davis-169 ½ Pete Spratt-170 ½ accompanied by Yves Edwards from Houston
Pete “Drago” Sell-176 Thales Leites-186
Brad Imes-260 ½ Heath Herring-245- came to the podium fully dressed including cowboy boots
Leonard Garcia-155 ½ Roger Huerta-155
Alan Belcher-184 Kendall Grove-185 ½-big pop, as did all the TUF guys
Yushin Okami-184 Mike Swick-184-Mike got a big pop since he is a hometown guy
Josh Koscheck-170 ½ Diego Sanchez-168 ½
Koz was totally booed and Diego got the Cena cheer. Half boo’s half cheering
There is legit heat with these two as they started shoving in the face to face and Diego wanted to go right there. Full blown pull apart and not one of those fake Don King ones either.
Matt Sera-169 ½ Georges St. Pierre-169 ½ -GSP got a rockstar pop. You know MMA is popular when a French-Canadian is this popular in Texas.

Even thought they weigh the same GSP looks a ton bigger. Sera seemed very relaxed backstage and was talking and taking pictures. GSP was friendly as well and posed for most fans. Except for Diego and Koz, most of the fighters seemed comfortable with their opponents . They had to stand next to each other in line as they went to the podium. Imes and Herring were even joking with each other.

There were a ton of fighter not on the card backstage. Matt Hughes, Jorge Gurgel, Paul Buentello, Rashad Evans, Forest Griffin, Alex Karalexis, and Solomon from Team Dagger was yelling for his boy Kendall.
Mike Goldberg and Joe Rogan were very approachable and talked and posed a ton. Rogan was still talking about Kenny Florian and how impressive he was. Goldy has obviously been hitting the gym lately. I guess when you sit next to Rogan over 12 times a year you have to. The most impressive was how big Big John McCarthy is. Standing next to Paul Buentello and he was taller and wider. Of course they all took a back seat to the brother of Heath Herring ho was about 6’ 10” and over 300 lbs. I don’t know if he is a fighter but he could be.
As I was leaving someone ran up to Mark Rattner and said to get Koz and his manager can come to the office . Apparently he and Diego are in some trouble and do not be surprised if one or both get a fine. Tito Ortiz will be in town for the fight in Kendall‘s corner. .

Black Sabbath-The Dio Years CD Review

2007-04-05T23:12:00.000-07:00

Black Sabbath has the unusual honor of being able to have reunions with 2 different singers. While Sabbath will always be associated with original singer Ozzy Osbourne, this compilation features the man who replaced him in Ronnie James Dio. Black Sabbath: The Dio Years concentrates on the classics, Heaven and Hell and Mob Rules. The two title tracks along with “Neon Nights”, “Turn Up The Night” and “Lady Evil” show why this incarnation of Sabbath was just as powerful.
The real key to this album is that it includes three newly recorded songs. “The Devil Cried” is similar to “Heaven and Hell“, with it’s slow, sludgy riff and Dio showing that he still has the pipes.
The only real disappointment is that “Children of the Sea” is from Live Evil, and while good it’s not as solid as the studio version. The Dio Years show that even though this was the second incarnation of the band , it was not a pale imitation and are legendary in their own right.

David Lee Roth-Sonrisa Salvaje CD Review

2007-04-04T23:40:00.000-07:00

Sonrisa Salvaje will be the greatest CD you will hear all year, assuming you are over 30. This is the long sought after CD release of David Lee Roth’s first solo album sung entirely in Spanish. Yes, Diamond Dave in español. While it would be easy to dismiss this as a novelty; what this is, is a testament to how cool David Lee Roth was. His Spanish is flawless on this and it is readily apparent that he is a fluent speaker. He does a great job fitting the Spanish lyrics with the rhythm and flow of their English counterparts, especially on “La Calle de Tobaco/Tobacco Road”. The signature Diamond Dave attitude is retained on “Rosa Yanqui/Yankee Rose” and “Loco Del Calor/Goin’ Crazy”. What should not be overlooked is how freaking tight the band was. Guitarist Steve Vai and bassist Billy Sheehan were out of their minds on this. They managed to out Van Halen, Van Halen.
It is interesting that this comes out the same time as Jennifer Lopez releases her Spanish album. Take a guess at which one is more fun. Siga adelante la divination.

Clutch-From Beale Street to Oblivion CD Review

2007-04-04T00:40:00.000-07:00

On their new CD, From Beale Street to Oblivion, Clutch have eschewed the last remnants of the experimental past and morphed into a heavy blues band. Normally, a drastic change like that would spell doom for a group but this is the result of a gradual evolution over the past couple of albums. “You Can’t Stop The Progress”, is perfectly titled album opener and serves as a template for the whole album. Lead single and video “Electric Worry”, is about as bluesy as one can get without being a parody. The head banging has given way to boogie. The perfect analogy would be to imagine ZZ Top if they grew up listening hard rock. You can even hear the spirit of Rev. Willy G. of “Opossum Minister“. In fact singer Neil Fallon at time sounds like Billy with a little more power. While Fallon may get all of the glory, guitarist Tim Sult should not be overlooked especially his Thin Lizzy-ish soloing on “White’s Ferry”. Most bands cannot evolve to the extent that this band has. Then again most bands aren’t Clutch.

Kaiser Chiefs-Yours Truly, Angry Mob CD Review

2007-04-04T00:37:00.000-07:00

The Kaiser Chiefs achieved critical and public success with their 2005 debut. While Yours Truly, Angry Mob does not have the same raw edge as the debut but it is a good follow-up. The album is packed with several Britpop gems. Opener “Ruby” is so catchy that it should be on the soundtrack for some teenage sex romp coming out this summer. It is not surprising that Blur producer Stephen Street helmed the board on this album as well as the debut. Psuedo title track “Angry Mob” and “Highroyds” both echo his previous employer. The album does have a few clunkers on it though. Ironically, the band did not seem to take their own advice on “Try Your Best”.
Amazingly, there are three different versions of the album. There is the regular 12-track one, a 15-track version from Best Buy, and lastly a deluxe edition that has the 12-track release with a DVD of 6 live songs and a short “making of” documentary. Even though Yours Truly polishes off the edges of their debut, it is still a worthy buy no matter which version you chose.

Dominoes falling Pt.1-UFC buys PrideFC

2007-03-27T22:51:00.000-07:00

The rumor became reality today when UFC announced its' acquisition of PrideFC with a press conference in Japan. Zuffa Inc. the parent company of UFc will create a new company Pride FC Worldwide. The immediate goal will be to get Pride back on network TV. Something they lost last year and set into motion the events that led to this sale. Pride president, Mr. Sakikabara, announced that he would step down and a new head would be announced shortly. With Sakikabara's departure, the last link to the scandal that tied Pride and organized crime together should be broken.
The deal includes Pride's video library as well as the contracts for all its' fighters.
The first thought that will come to mind is the amount of "superfights" that are on the landscape. There is Mirko-Fedor 2, Fedor-Coutre, Fedor-Arlovski, Fedor-Liddell, Liddell-Henderon, Tito-Rua, Franklin-Henderson, Liddell-Rua, and the list goes on. At first notice you will see the name Fedor listed repeatedly. Besides being the baddest man on the planet he just resigned his contract with Pride.
Or did he?
The full details of the arrangement are not well-known but his contract has some outs since he is scheduled to headline BodogFights PPV next month against Matt Lindland. It is not unimaginable to think that Fedor's representatives would have put an out clause in his contract. When he signed in Dec., the rumors of Pride being sold were flying around. So they knew Fedor would have been the biggest of the big free agents, so why not ensure his most maximum earning potential by having a something that says if Pride is sold his contract is up. In all of the press release info that I have seen the name Fedor is not mentioned once. That in itself is surprising considering who he is and the clout he brings with him. I am just curious if there is still some gray area with his contract and no one is sure of where he stands. There is also the possibility that with the Bodog PPV only weeks away, that UFC did not want to give a competitor any free publicity. Of course since Bodog seems incapable of publicizing their own PPV I don't think it would matter.
What is for certain that fans of MMA are in for a banner year of entertainment. While the rest of the sports world has ignored this, UFC has positioned themselves as the next big thing.

Type O Negative-Dead Again CD Review

2007-03-20T08:16:00.000-07:00

It is fitting that Rasputin is on the cover of the new CD from Type O Negative, Dead Again. One can draw the analogy from Rasputin's demise, go Google it, to the last couple of years for Type O's singer/bassist Pete Steele. Steele spent some time in an asylum, of his own accord, rehab, and a short stint at the gray bar hotel for according to him “accidentally punching someone in the face 40 or 50 times“.
All of the drama had lead to one fine album. Opening with "Dead Again", with a sense of aggression that is reminiscent of Carnivore, Steele's band before Type O. The band takes a dip in the doom/stoner metal waters with "The Profits of Doom". On the first half of the CD, Steele's vocals sound closer to Danzig than his usual metal Barry White smoothness. "She Burned Me Down" and "An Ode to Locksmiths" sound like they could have come off any of the previous Type O Negative albums.
On Dead Again, Type O Negative have shown tremendous growth without ignoring their past. Thereby making all the fans happy and releasing a great album at the same time.

Scott Weiland is an idiot. Oh and he can't sing either!

2007-03-14T09:04:00.000-07:00

Sunday night they had the latest inductions to the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame. This batch should have been good wit the promise of a Van Halen reunion that would kick off their tour. However, Eddie checked himself into rehab and obvious that must take president. His brother and drummer Alex also chose not to be there. Bassist and most underrated member Michael Anthony and singer number two Sammie Hagar took the stage to accept the award. Both guys gave very sincere and heartfelt acceptance speeches and made mention of those that were not there. Of course Sammie did commit the biggest rock faux paus and wore a t-shirt of his own band. He should know that only obscure black metal bands do that.

The name missing is original singer and frontman extraordinarie Diamond David Lee Roth. His reason for not showing was that the Hall wanted to him to sing "You Really Got Me" and he said BS since that is a cover song and wanted to do a VH original. First, where do the suits that run the Hall get off on telling what song an act should perform. They are not getting inducted the band is. I think the fact that Dave was being told what to do added wit the fact that Eddie was not going to be there made the perfect recipe for his absence.

Now, where it gets interesting is that Velvet Revolver, who inducted VH, played a VH song and was supposed to do a song with them. So VR lead singer butchered a VH song, and by butcher I mean if he was playing in a local bar he would have been knocked unconscious with all the beer bottles and chairs that were flying at him bad. So in the post on blabermouth.net
Weiland says that he and the band didn't want to play "Jump", it did not meet the artistic standards of the band.

What? Are you fucking kidding me? Just shut the fuck up you junkie and sing the song that the legend wants to play. Weiland should be thanking God that he is still alive and actually has a career that lets him play with VH. The only reason that Velvet Revolver was there was to push their new CD that is about to come out. The balls that this skinny talentless fuck has shown are unbelievable. It is the equivalent of me telling DeNiro that I don;t want to press for the new movie that he picked me from obscurity to co-star in.

Weiland's statement really pisses me off, and not just his Diva-like attitude. I liked the first VR album, I did not think it was the reinvention of the wheel that some critics thought but good none the less. What made me mad is that I am a HUGE fan of Stone Temple Pilots. I love everyone of the bands CD's, even Shangri La De Da, which many did not hear. If you read my review of the Army of Anyone CD you see how much I thought Weiland was an integral part of the band. Granted the DeLeo Brothers are incredible songwriters and players but his voice gave their music form.

It is so disappointing when one of your favorites artists open their mouth and say something so stupid and insulting. It's not like he pulled a Dixie Chicks and started talking outside of his knowledge realm. He thinks that he should tell Diamond Dave what to do. What a fucking idiot.

IFL Battleground, the next Nitro?

2007-03-13T07:47:00.000-07:00

Monday night saw the debut of IFL Battleground, their 2 hour primetime show on MyNetwork. So how would the new league take advantage of their unopposed opportunity? Would they highlight certain fighters, or coaches, or the format?

How about, do the bait and switch and basically equate their product to toughman contest.

I had a bad feeling when the shows disembodied voice sounded like he should be hyping Wrestlemania 75, instead he heard him talk about heart pounding, bone snapping, and blood splattering. All night long the voice kept promising that someone would get carted out on an ambulance. Complete with the sound of a 911 operator. Someone has made the decision to market this as car crash TV instead of the great sport that it is.

One would figure that with a 2 hour format we could see many fights. Well we did except they were highly edited and lasted all of two minutes, amazing when you consider that a round is four minutes long. I guess they hired the guys from the Contender, since they were able to boil down a 3-minute round into 30 seconds. Makes sense when you consider how popular that show was. Geez! Oh, and the fight they they hyped were someone gets taking out on a stretcher. It was when Ryan Schultz was KO'd. This was hardly a devastating knockout in comparison to say Evans-Salmon. If a viewer made the mistake of watching for 2 hours just to see that moment they would have been incredibly disappointed.

On top of the edited matches, all of the fighters were won by KO. Not one submission was shown, apparently someone up top has decided to market IFL as boxing. This will be a fatal move as boxing fans will not be won over with "bad boxing". You have to sell them and other non-fans, that IFL is a new sport and not the barroom brawl that many of the detractors make it out to be.

That is the most troubling aspect of the show, IFL Battleground seemed to fulfill every low expectation that has been said about MMA. I kept expecting Jim Lampley to be listed as executive producer.

On the good side. Chris Hordecki was pushed as a star, as he should be because he is arguably the best fighter in the league. The other fighter that was given extensive coverage was heavyweight Ben Rothwell. The feud the show seemed to stress was between two coaches, Ken and Frank Shamrock. Having these guys will be a big plus since they both know how to sell a fight. Add in Bas Rutten and Don Frye and IFL has the best collection of talkers on Monday night.

To show you how bad of a show this was, it made Bodog Fights seem like a UFC PPV. If anyone does a small amount of Googling, you can see the plethora amount of bad reviews the show has gotten. Unless the IFL does some major changing this show will be canceled and the company will have blown the best opportunity that they could have ever had. All of the momentum from the 60 Minutes feature and the subsequent rise in stock prices will be for naught. Kind of like the way one felt after watching this show.

Korn-MTV Unplugged CD Review

2007-03-09T07:47:00.000-08:00

At first glance, the thought of Korn doing an unplugged CD is pretty unpleasant. However, in execution the band does a great job of adapting their heavy music to the acoustic format. Most of the sings are drastically rearranged and feature such un-metal instruments as bongos and wind chimes. Leading off with “Blind” the band adds Latin rhythms and Spanish guitars., Throughout the album singer Jonathan Davis does a terrific job in adapting his voice to softer tones and inflecting his angry side at the right moments. This is especially highlighted on “Freak on a Leash”, now a duet with Amy Lee of Evanessence. The song is a testament to the band for being able to rework one of their best know songs and arguably making it better. Also making a guest appearance is The Cure’s Robert Smith on “Make Me Bad//IN Between Days”. Korn tries their hand at “Creep” by Radiohead but it comes off flat. The song does not have the big guitars that were the hook in the original version does. MTV Unplugged, shows Korn in an impressive new light and is a must for fans and should win respect from their detractors.

Sevendust-Alpha CD Review

2007-03-09T07:45:00.000-08:00

Alpha marks the return of Sevendust after a lengthy hiatus where the band had to deal with sobriety, divorce, a bad label and death. The bands return is always good because that ensures that one gets to hear Lajon Witherspoon’s vocals. He possesses one of the most unique vocal sounds. Imagine Chuck D crossed with an R&B singer doing hardcore. The band was always lumped in with the nu-metal category but that was due to the timing of their debut. Unfortunately the band does not seem to have evolved since then. Alpha follows the Sevendust pattern to a T. Lajon’s smooth vocals on verses with shouting in the chorus. Drummer Morgan Rose’s melancholy lyrics and solid drumming. Lastly, guitar riffs that have now become cliché. One would think that with Sevendust reemerging at a time when bands they influenced would be a good thing. Unfortunately they seem to blend in with the others and at times sound dated. Alpha will satisfy diehards but very few others.

Die Hunns-You Rot Me CD Review

2007-03-06T16:37:00.000-08:00

You Rot Me is the second release form Die Hunns, a psuedo punk super group. The band has an impressive pedigree with Duane Peters and Jamie Reidling from the US Bombs, Zander Schloss ex-Circle Jerks, Nate Shaw from the Skulls and Corey Parks from Nashville Pussy. The experience that all the members have comes through the speakers with each and every song. Songs like ”Mad Society” normally would be a punk rock cliché but the Peters strong vocals are able to transmit true frustration. “Rock and Roll Boulevard” displays Peters low growl that sounds like Omar and the Howlers if they grew up in 1970’s New York. Song subjects stay true to punk rock ethos and deal with frustration with society, being a misfit, and loving and losing. “Ain’t It A Shame” is one of the tracks that have both Peters and Parks trading vocals. It is a great track about the frustrations of the music industry. ”Jorge”, an incredibly catchy song about drug dealing, also has Peters singing lead and Parks on the chorus. Die Hunns have the good fortune of having two vocalists and the flexibility that they can bring. When Parks sings lead on “On My Mind” she seems to channel vintage Joan Jett and that is a very good thing. Parks vocals really shine on “Don’t Want To Hear It Anymore”. Her deep voice is a perfect vehicle for Schloss’ lyrics. A very emotional track that underscores the bands experience. You Rot Me, is the record that the New York Dolls should have made. It sounds like it came right out of the gutter and did not bother to clean itself up before walking in your house.

Deron Miller is a fuckin' douche and Slayer Rules

2007-02-25T21:47:00.000-08:00

Most people that walk the face of God's green earth have no idea who Deron Miller is so let me give some background. Deron is the guitar player on a band called CKY. They play very average mall Metal but have carved out a decent career. Deron is a decent guitar player and is currently involved with a tribute for the late Death guitarist Chuck Schuldiner. A very noble dead that should not go unrecognized. However most of the bands success is attributed to the fact that the drummer is Jesse Margera who just happens to bet he brother of Bam Margera. By some stretch of coincidence, the band has popped up in many skateboard mags and appeared on some of Bam's TV shows. It could be argued that their oft-seen logo is more famous than they are.
The same association that has brought them success has brought them scorn from the Metal community. The majority of Metal fans treat CKY with a certain matter of disdain, if they acknowledge them at all. It would seem that since CKY is successful on their own right then they should not worry about what people say. Most of the band seems to follow that line of reasoning except for out pal Deron. He is notorious for trolling the internet message boards reading what people have said about him. My first run in with him was when I said that I liked one of their songs but I thought that Deron came off like a jerk when he wrote a maniacal retort to a Rolling Stone review. He then sent me a lengthy email calling me ugly, fat, bitter, loser and a failure.

First, Rolling Stone did give him a bad review, a 1 out of 5, but they slammed Black Sabbath also. Plus, who gives a crap what Rolling Stone thinks anyway? They haven't had any credibility since the movie Perfect. His response to the review wasn't just in words. Deron being the insecure asshole that he is, posted the reviewers home phone number on the internet so the legion of CKY fans, who make ICP fans see like Opera folk, could harass her. To top it off he publicly stated that he hoped the reviewer dies. Ease up fuckhead, it is just a review. If you don't care what Rolling Stone thinks about you why are getting so upset? So if you read the responses here or here. You can see how the vast majority of people think that Deron is off his rocker a tad.

Fast forward to the present and our buddy Deron inserts foot into mouth. In a message with one of his fans on the "Ask Cky" of the bands website he responded to fans question of how Slayer's Tom Araya could be a Christian while he sings for Slayer. He responded by saying he hates Slayer and that since they are old they must have forgot how to do their jobs. Also he accused them of following trends and since they won a Grammy then they must not be cool. The last one is ironic since he got his panties in a wad over the Rolling Stone article. Slayer may be old but they still do their jobs better now than most bands have ever done them. Plus, Deron do you plan on quitting music when you get their age? I think not and you should be grateful that Slayer shows that you can still thrash in your forties. The funniest one was how Slayer has followed trends. He "evidence" was the punk covers LP, Undisputed Attitude. Yeah, an album of covers by Minor Threat, TSOL, D.I., D.R.I. and some original tracks that were originally written when Jeff Hanneman was in a punk band before Slayer, yeah that is catering to the mainstream.

Now if Deron has said that he never cared for Slayer that would have been one thing. He would have caught some shit but not as much as he is now. He though decided to go at them hardcore and has now brought down the wrath of Satan. He has quickly released a follow up on Blabbermouth saying that he did not think his original post was newsworthy. Ironic since he usually tries to get a mention anytime he does something. In it he says that he was just stating his opinion so why is everyone upset. Again, this is the part where he needs to look in the mirror since he goes into a rage whenever someone brings up the Margera brother connection or calls them mallcore. The funniest part is his insult to Slayer fans;
"So go crack open a Pabst and dig out one of your old 'Reign in Blood' tapes and have a fucking blast. I'd rather throw on 'Master of Puppets' [METALLICA], 'Bonded by Blood' [EXODUS] and 'The New Order' [TESTAMENT], because they're just better bands."

Great association, since most Slayer fans probably have those same bands "tapes" also, idiot. He also said that MALEVOLENT CREATION and GORGUTS are way more extreme. Excuse me Deron, who do you think was the biggest influence on these bands?
The reason I have spent way too much time writing this is because Deron Miller is a FUCKING ASSHOLE and I needed to vent. For this pathetic mother fucker to slam Slayer and then do everything that he has harassed people for doing is beyond pathetic. Deron should get down on his knees and than God that Jesse Margera seems to like him because if he was kicked out of CKY he would be selling guitar strings at a swap meet.

In closing, Deron, do us all a favor and do the one thing you are good at. Nothing. Remember the next time you, the pot, call the kettle black someone may just hit you upside the head with one.

MIke Awesome-R.I.P.

2007-02-19T16:24:00.000-08:00

News surfaced today that for pro wrestler Mike Awesome has died of apparent suicide. Friends went to pick him up and when he did not answer they became suspicious. As of late he had been working as a realtor in Florida.
Awesome came to prominence in Japan with his partner Big Titan, later to become the fake Razor Ramon. He was incredibly agile and could do tope's and walk the top rope. Plus with his time in the bloody FMW, he had no problem working a physical and bloody match. He made a big splash when he was in ECW, starting with a match against J.T. Smith when he lept over the top rope to clothesline Smith and seemingly break his back. He was a phenomenal manuever from a man of Awesome' s size. He was 6 foot 6 and ran close to 280-290 lbs. Besides he had one of the juiciest mullets this side of Joe Elliot. His status took another jump when he had a series of matches against Masato Tanaka. They were violent and spectacular matches that helped to up ECW's reputation.

He had the good fortune of being hot when there was a wrestling war going on. While still ECW champion he signed a deal with WCW, Eric Bischoff wanted Awesome to bring the title and throw it in the trash like Medusa had done with the WWF women's belt earlier. He has said that he would not have done that but ECW's Paul Heyman had a court order against him and the belt. Awesome returned to ECW for one match to drop the belt to Taz who was a WWF wrestler at the time. Many think this was a turning point for ECW since their champion was a glorified jobber for WWF.
WCW took Awesome and his amazing ability that the vast majority of wrestling fans
had yet to see and changed his gimmick. Instead of being a big man that could move like cruiserweight at times, he was turned into That 70's guy. Complete with polyester pants and and white shoes and a lava lounge. To top it off he became the "fat chick thriller", because nothing sells tickets like a guy who loves fat girls.

He had some other angles but nothing major. After the collapse of WCW, he was part of the Invasion angle but again was not used to his ability. He faded away and aside from some indy shows, he gave up wrestling. Until the ECW One Night Only PPV where he had another match against Tanaka. It stole the show and had the already rowdy crowd, blow the roof off the building. He blew his knee out in that match as said he was done unless someone made the right offer. No one made that offer and Mike went back to Florida.
The news of his death is a shock and my thoughts go out to his family. Hopefully everyone will remember Mike for all the enjoyment that he had brought us with his actions in and out of the ring. R.I.P. Mike